The Joys of a DIYer

[Mowk]

I never did understand dressing up a pet in people wear. And the video was a hoot.

[promethean75]

the practical reason is to keep a short haired breed of dog like that warm during the winter months. that's understandable and appropriate. but this context is a little different and becomes gloriously comical once it's understood. this isn't just a dog in a sweater. it's a symbol representing everything pretentious about bourgeois culture. the uselessness of the breed itself... compared to working dog breeds... as an expression of the luxury of royalty and the elite class that doesn't have to labor. the emperors surrounded by a pack of shih-tzus, for instance, captures this image perfectly. next comes the gross anthropomorphization of the animal; the bourgeois expresses its latent desire to be 'god' in humanizing the creature... making it a little person-pet it can order around and laugh at in adoration whenever company is around. 'oh isn't that adorable! look at his little sweater!'

and the impotence of the toy dog's harmless barking. the little useless dog that won't shut up... that think's its in charge. the little boss, much like the bourgeois owner, who's bark is always worse than his bite.

all these metaphors and analogies come together to form a perfect rendition of the joke of the bourgeois spirit. you ought to see the way the sumo wrestler queen interacts with this insect of a dog. it's almost nauseating. i get my hopes up that the german shepherd will eat the dog and then attack her, but it never happens.

[Mowk]

You can provide an animal warm with out dressing it up in a people suit.

I ain't even going to comment on anything else you said.

[Mowk]

I found some maple. Not the right dimensions but a table saw, a good rip blade and a dado blade works wonders. Sucks to have to change back and forth between the rip blade and dado set. That takes more time then I imagined. Got about half the floor relaid. Back breaking labor, but a break every couple hours, makes it less the chore, and I can drink beer, which I like, lots. Lots slower going then I thought.

[promethean75]

so you've got some maple that isn't already tongue-and-grooved? what the hell is it... it can't be flooring because if it was it would already have it.

so you're literally doing this floor from scratch, man. that's hardcore af. here's what you do to avoid having to switch between blades; run all of it through the dado blade first, or, rip all of it first. then you only have to cut the pieces to length and you'll be done with the table saw.

how are you gonna fasten it to the floor? you got a flooring nailer?

and if it's not too late to make this suggestion, use plastic biscuits instead of wooden ones (are you using biscuits?). as a general rule, wood will always shrink, expand and flex in different temperatures and over long periods of time. when those biscuits get'ta moving around, the seams start opening up and shit.

if you have any significant dips in the sub-floor, a man oughta run a few beads of construction adhesive underneath those pieces to prevent squeaking. run you a string line across the floor from wall to wall to find those dips.

man's milling his own flooring outta raw maple. hard.core.as.fuck.

[Mowk]

It's fastened to the floor just like it was the day it was built. It's reclaimed maple flooring, It's just not the right width, so I'm only milling one side.

[promethean75]

are you using that dado blade on a radial arm saw or a table saw? i ask because it sounded like you were using a table saw when you said something about 'having to switch blades'. if you are using a table saw, what i meant to say earlier (if you aren't already doing it) is that you ought to rip the whole stack first, and then change the blade and cut the groove. i assume you're doing this, but i can't be sure so i mention it. hey, i've worked with knuckleheads who would do that very thing; swap the blade back and forth a hundred times rather than ripping/grooving everything at once.

another tip: put a five degree bevel (long point on the top) of each piece at the butt joint. this eliminates any gaping at the joints. a square cut won't get the joints that tight. tight, but not that tight.

and what's the rip width of this stuff? don't go smaller than two and a half inches because the pieces won't be as strong.

[Mowk]

Hey Prom,

Thanks for the advice. Two table saws would solve my problem a lot easier. The reclaimed maple flooring I purchased is 2 1/2 inches wide. I needed to mill it down to match 2 1/4 in flooring. When it was removed it wasn't done tenderly, so there is damage on either the tongue side or the grove side. If the reclaimed wood was clean I could have done as you suggested. But there are three condition issues I have run into. The tongue side of the reclaimed floor has no damage (is a clean edge) then I just rip off 1/4 in and run it through with the dado blade to put in a new groove. If the damage on the reclaimed maple is all on the tongue side then I dado on the front and back of the tongue 1/4 in to clean of that line then rip the tongue down to fit in the groove. The third case which has turned out to be the norm requires cleaning up the edge of the face on both the tongue and groove sides. That means dado blade of an 1/8 in. on the tongue, Ripping off an 1/8 in. on the groove side, and then running the dado blade to deepen the groove to accommodate the tongue on the existing flooring. I wish I could have just ripped all the reclaimed maple wood down, then ran it all through with the dado set, but I just ain't that lucky.

I spent close to two months looking for 2 1/4 in. reclaimed maple of the period. Doing all the custom milling wasn't the original plan. It's like the fourth plan to restore the floor. Originally it was just suppose to be a repair. At one point I had a line on 380 square feet of 2 1/4 in. maple from the same mill. That would have required pulling the entire floor up, renting a trailer and driving 150 miles to pick it up. During the negotiation process of just buying half, the lot was sold before I could swing the deal.

All your ideas are sound, if the conditions could have been met. I just couldn't find a way to meet the conditions. So the job has turned into custom craft work, which is slowing down my pace. It is looking sweet. And to think the whole project began because the wife wanted to replace the carpeting and our pleco Neptune needed a bigger tank. The two goals sort of spiraled into reinforcing the floor, extending plumbing and drain lines, electrical extensions, plastering, painting, restoring the hardwood, and finding the required extra wood to fill in all the damage done in a hundred years. It's a job we never could have afforded if we hired it out. There is even a custom hatch in the new floor to accommodate a drain, and water lines where the new tank will go, so I won't have to haul drain water and fill water to maintain the new tank.

I bought enough extra wood to build a nice maple stand for the new aquarium. So after the floor is done, I will be putting on a cabinetry makers cap. The new tank will weight close to 700 lbs so a little structural support was required to support the load.

Thanks for the suggestions and offering up the advice, from one DIYer to an other.

[promethean75]

The reclaimed maple flooring I purchased is 2 1/2 inches wide. I needed to mill it down to match 2 1/4 in flooring.

only a quarter inch difference? shit id'a just laid it like it is. you wouldn't even see that difference on the first run unless you were looking for it. unless it's like in the middle of the room. in that case, i understand. so will this new flooring run all the way to a wall and terminate, or will you have to tie it in to existing stuff? i ask because that can end up in a major tragedy; your last run might be wider or thinner than 2.25 inches... and then you'll REALLY see it.

And to think the whole project began because the wife wanted to replace the carpeting and our pleco Neptune needed a bigger tank. The two goals sort of spiraled into reinforcing the floor, extending plumbing and drain lines, electrical extensions, plastering, painting, restoring the hardwood

mm-hm... that's how it always happens. first the old lady just wants to put the fish in a bigger tank and then she's got you rebuilding the entire house. next thing you know you got the fuckin mexicans on the roof and everything.

reinforcing that floor. you know you can just sister the existing joists instead of adding more. 2x10s, right? hell yeah just double em up. if they're laid out on sixteen inch centers, you're good. in fact, you might not even have to reinforce the floor. look up the load bearing capacity of those joists online.

The new tank will weight close to 700 lbs so a little structural support was required to support the load.

it wouldn't hurt to build the frame outta 4x4, you know. if you build it with 2x4, you better cross brace the shit out of it or it'll wanna lean and wobble under that tank.

[Mowk]

It's tied in to existing stuff. And no, I can't just lay it like it is. Hey I realize you mean well, but you aren't seeing all the specifics. Imagine a 2 and a quarter floor where I'm missing 20 square feet in a 150 square foot room that ties into an other maple floor in an other 150 square foot room that was laid with wood from four different mills and has been fucked by 100 years of owners thinking I'll just invest the minimum, and cover it up. I don't do shit the easy way I do it the right way.

Sorry man, been sleeping 3 hours a night, got myself into a deep case of SADs, the wood I bought was the best I could find and it sucks and I'm into the last 1/6 th of the project. I'm now stuck with the plan. The floor is already reinforced, the wiring, plumbing, plastering, painting, are done, the tank is on order and the maple is being burned up cause it's shit distressed and inconsistent as hell. Was suppose to be free of nails and clean and it isn't.

I'm venting and frustrated and taking it out on you. About all I need from a DIYer at this point is; been there done that, yeah it sucks, and it all worked out in the end and looks great. OK?

[promethean75]

About all I need from a DIYer at this point is; been there done that, yeah it sucks, and it all worked out in the end and looks great. OK?

no. not okay. it is our duty, or moral obligation, as DIYers to provide advice, give tips and share our experiences with working the wood. that's all i wuz doin. i've been workin the wood for almost thirty years and i am a veritable wellspring of wood-working wisdom. i make bob vila look like martha stewart, my nig.

[Mowk]

You have and I appreciated it. 5/6 th of the way into a project and not groking all the details, I'd settle for a little encouragement from one DIYer to another.

Dig the idea that ship has sailed. You get to the dock before she goes great. Get to the dock after she sails all I'm hoping for is, best wishes for smooth sailing, and your next port is awaiting.

[promethean75]

bro, you got it. just take your time and try to bend at the knees during the dreaded, back-breaking monotony of going back and forth like a typewriter for an hour and you've only covered like ten square feet. i know, it sucks. it's like never-ending and progress never seems to be made. same thing with laying shingles. you're like wtf i've been in this spot for a fucking hour and i've laid like fifteen square feet. the trick is... don't look at the room, just the section you're in.

but just think how good you'll feel when it's done. 'i did that. that's my labor. i made that shit happen. i didn't take some money i made off some poor shmuck and pay another poor shmuck to lay it for me, and then tell myself i've done something. no. i actually did this, mark. this is all me.'

[Mowk]

Thanks Prom, it's laid. Will rent a sander after thanksgiving. Next phase, any pointers? Finish advice? Was thinking polyurethane, but I was told it yellows.

[promethean75]

There are other options. Get with Bob on that...

https://www.bobvila.com/articles/8-hard ... -finishes/

[Mowk]

Rented a floor sander, too much heat build up melted the shellac finish and gummed up the sanding disks, no setting to adjust the speed sucks. Now stripping by hand with denatured alcohol. That puts the project back again. Sucks I won't have it done by the holidays. Dammit.

[promethean75]

sonofabitch. probably should've sanded the hardwood before you finished it, then you could've just put a soft buffer on that sander and it wouldn't have disturbed the finish.

whatever happens, mowk, i want you to know you fucking earned that floor, man.

[Aegean]

Hey...hey...watch that language mister...Mowk will red-flag you....arbitrarily.
He's kept this forum free from insults for this long - don't ruin his good performance record.

[Mowk]

Darn straight Prom. It is "my" floor. Thinking about doodling a sig in the corner with a wood burner.

[Mowk]

Aegean, you are a card. :LOL: pretty crafty recruiter huh?
"Come into my web", said the spider to the fly.
There will be no escape for you soon enough.

[Aegean]

Word monitor present...be warned.
Language police on the premises.
Back to newspeak....

[Mowk]

No escaping. UR it.

[Aegean]

Yes officer. I've been a good boy.
I wanted to call someone a 'retarded cunt', the other day and I said 'mentally deficient vagina' instead.
Did I do good...'cause it was you?

Newspeak si goodspeak.

[Mowk]

I must have missed it.

[Mowk]

I must have missed it. You're such a nice piece of wool.