But thats the whole point I’m making.
I know some people who tried mild drugs and completely freaked out. You’ve already have to be relatively strong to even endure drugs. Let alone to go into it properly, and let alone to get out of it.
Completely agree.
Almost everybody is an addict. Most people, if you pull away their New York times and their Starbucks latte they have no idea what to do with themselves. Ive rarely met a person who had gotten into drugs who hadn’t won a great deal of interesting experience on its account.
Why do you think I ever did drugs? To make life easier??? Hahahahahaha
If thats what I wanted out of it Id have left it all alone after I tried my first bit of weed.
Gib -
“Ah, so to become greater than you ever were even with the help of drugs. ← That certainly is a holy grail if ever there was one.”
Yes.
If Nietzsche is to be taken seriously, perhaps the place to find the strongest men is among those called the weakest. The most reviled.
Nandayo.
Thats absolutely beyond any question.
Look at this world, Society. Does it behave like there are any strong people in respected positions?
Trump is the only person Ive ever seen with status that isn’t insanely weak. Well, our ex Queen Beatrix is strong too. And there have been some. But over 99 percent of people who are well regarded are invertebrates.
Note: I mean in our society. The shit we have to deal with.
I could have been, would have been as rich as that idiot Joker thinks I am, much richer even, if I had been able to glide along in the shit-stream of the film industry to which my talents gave me access. I could have bought houses and cars for my family and sometimes wish Id gone that road but I just could not endure the pointless, philosophically utterly frigid, narratively artificial kindergarten it all was.
I told myself: Ive been making stories on film for 3 years and I was really good at it but now I’ve told everything I can tell, and Ill need some real bad ass experience in order to make a cool film. So I quit the prestigious school which refuses 99 percent of applicants, for which I had worked so hard, because it only harboured porcelain doll type humans and I felt Id end up one myself there.
Look at this shit.
[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dn0vOOiwOhc[/youtube]
My friend in film school, only one who had some balls, we were doing camera both, finally decided to share-direct a film. Look at this horrible travesty, the utter faiblesse.
He once told me, when I was already deep down in the pits, when I was making some humiliating confessions, that he envied me because he didn’t have any sort of such trouble or challenges and thus fucking crazy weird stories like I was oozing with. That was pretty cool of him to admit. But only after he made this movie, years later, I realized he wasn’t even kidding.
Brother, its all about the stories you can tell.
My grandfather told me, youve got the best profession there is - storytelling.
Yeah well, I thought then, thats all very cool grandpa but you have the best stories.
So I went out and made war with myself, as there wasn’t any war raging so I could do what he did to get his fucking stories.
My other grandfather, oh man did he have stories.
Say, did you ever jump out of a cattle train in the middle of winter Poland to save your life?
They were stopped by the other “passengers” the first night for fear, the second night he got an accomplice and they jumped when the train made a shit-stop, and they lay on the rails underneath the train.
They walked and walked through the snow and finally knocked on a door. Turns out it was a ss officers door.
He ended up chained to this other guy for a year.
But he escaped again.
Odysseus.
Andra moi ennepe mousa polutropon hos mala polla planchte… as far as I get.
Muse tell of the man who had such troubles on the road…
Why tell of the man who got home, ate his porridge and cuddled with his wife and went to sleep so he could go back to his job where he was well respected by the board members and regarded as “a solid guy”?
Who cares?
The point and truth is, one does not quit drugs to improve one’s self. One quits drugs to save one’s life.
That does require admitting that one’s life is all fucked and likely leading to an untimely death (often if one is lucky) first. Addicts are notoriously adept at avoiding this admission. Not because of what it would say about them, but because then they would no longer be able to do drugs.
My point was that drugs, as a means of self-overcoming, of making life more difficult, represent in some men a will to greatness (of course there are those who do drugs to make tv more enjoyable but lets not dwell on them) and that stopping use of them has to do with recognition of having reached the end of the line with this particular means. Yes, one stops drugs to preserve ones life, and Ive seen plenty of friends die for failing at such politics before oneself, but, to iterate the singular Nietzchean point, preserving life is not itself the purpose of life.
Why preserve ones life? For fear of death? I don’t think so. For fear of dying? In part. For fear of the misery one would inflict? Yes, surely that is a part. And this shows how ones purposes for staying alive lie beyond oneself. For fear of wasting ones potential, ones greatness, on a mere experience? This fear is born of greatness.
Why preserve ones life?
Because will to power.
I’d say that’s quite the improvement. 
You don’t notice a distinction?
If we were in rehab, now would be the time where I tell you how much more hardcore my drug use was than yours. But I’ll skip it.
Now you know, Gib.
Good luck, and as always, at your service if ever you need it!
You deserve to live right. That you should also hear. And that it is possible.
From there on, one thing that is not possible is forcing an addict to get help. Tis why our only mission is to make sure you have the facts.
I know I did this all wrong somehow, but fuck it. Like I said at the beginning, this was more for me than for you. I have remembered much.
Truest thing I ever heard at rehab:
At the gates of heaven,
First me, then me, and if there is any left over,
For me.
You don’t have a sense of humor?
Do the competitions really get that petty?
Don’t beat yourself up over it. Even if you didn’t rub me the wrong way, I’d still be pretty adamant about doing this my way. And always remember, this is ILP. People aren’t nice here. It’s a place to scrap. You sorta get used to it after a while. It becomes fun in a twisted way.
That’s too bad, this place is starting to liven up a bit. I’m trying real hard to revive this poor girl of a forum.
We’re going to need this forum when the massive internet censorship purges begin in the United States concerning thought crimes.
She’s doing fine, we still live together.
Over the years I’ve learned one thing, this modern society is its own worse enemy, it will simply tear itself a part. 