we couldn’t believe that such a farcical attempt at reason could exist for so long. it literally lasted hundreds of years. the lengths that this type of man - what in bio-economical terms we’ve defined as an ‘ergonomic parasite’ - would go to in an effort to defend and justfy his ‘right’ not to work, was astonishing. and they employed all manner of philosophers to do so. from ontology to religion to economics, they tried to design a comprehensive body of knowledge and science to prove it had to be like this… that it wouldn’t work any other way. even the poets and artists went to work under its banner. finally an entire world view was manufactured that captivated everyone, and all for one end; to keep this parasite from having to labor. we had originally thought it was for something more profound… like a genuine attempt to define and understand human nature… and for a while it was convincing. they used darwin, nietzsche, adam smith, and many others to build a theory around the premise that man had to be naturally exploitative and competitive in order to recognize and realize his greatest potential. but then that fell through as so much more dubious speculation already engendered by the momentum of the market revolutions taking place; even philosophy took the new form of production which would mirror the modes of economy now prevalent. a great explosion of productive force over the course of a few decades, and next thing you know, all the philosophers were writing about it as if they had found the philosopher’s stone. well of course they were… there was a market for the crap they were writing, so of course they did it. we watched the world spontaneously divide into two classes right before our eyes; the bourgeois team of business owners and philosopher hacks that supported them, and the proletarian team of workers and revolutionary theorists who immediately set to stopping this charade before half of the earth was crawling with them. we quickly won the theoretical war with little effort, wiping the conservative thinkers out. the capitalist theory/practice literally blew itself up… we hardly had to make an effort. now we were waiting for the dialectic of history to fire it off. but we’d never forget this greatest of ironies in the history of man; how could such a centuries long magnificent body of theoretical hot air evolve that would end up proving only one thing for sure? that the parasite type would do anything to come up with an excuse not to work. that’s it. that’s all it was. what an unbelievable hoax. no great discoveries, no cutting edge scientific knowledge, no pioneering fields of research. nothing. how could it have taken us so long to see through this facade and call this bullshit out? that’s the question we ask ourselves, and that we were so long deceived by it is a testament to the extraordinary ability of the lazy creature man to use all of his faculties and sophistication to figure out a way to avoid having to work. now that the revolution is over, we’ve changed the title of adam smith’s ‘wealth of nations’ to ‘how to stay on the couch and get the other guy to do the work’. it’s become a bit of an international joke now. we keep it in a museum in which we have on exhibit old capitalism relics. philosophy books, economic equations, novels (we’ve got all of rand’s stuff in a gallery), propaganda art (music and film), all sorts of stuff. it’s become quite the tourist attraction.
- Those Damned Blue-Collar Tweekers, ‘Reflections on the Revolution’, 2067, reprint edition.