LIFE = experiences…
we are born, that is an experience…
we have things happen to us… those are experiences…
we die, that is an experience… just one we cannot give any sort of
report on…
life is just a series of experiences and then we spend the rest of the time
attempting to understanding those experiences…
I fell in love… what does that experience mean?
I broke a leg… what does that experience mean?
at times we fall into crisis because we are unable to
make sense of our experiences…
what does being human mean?
what is the truth? and does the truth only exists for a human being?
what is the truth of experience?
some day it all get to be so much, we say fuck it and some watch
the “real housewives of Orange county” which is what my wife does…
and I binge watch some Star trek series…DS9 right now…
but no matter how hard I try to escape those questions…
at night in the quiet of the dark…I hear those questions…
like fog blanketing the air…what is truth? what is life? what
is the meaning of experiences and what is the truth of experiences?
I don’t know… I don’t know…I don’t know
and I am as haunted by my failure as much as I am haunted by
the questions that so torment me…
it would be a shame if I don’t get my answers before I leave this life…
and it is becoming clearer by the day, that maybe, maybe I won’t get my
answers before my time is up and that makes me work harder at
studying and thinking and reflecting on what it means to be human…
I resent those times taken away from me…
that prevents me from my work at hand…
the understanding of who we are and what we are
and what are we suppose to do…
I can’t depend on some vague promise of a “next life” to
give me some hope of finding answers…
perhaps the point isn’t to find answers, but to ask the questions…
maybe the point is to make us aware of something beyond just
walking about in our dreams and being fixated in our daily routine…
awake, awake… you have a life to lead…
the life of a dull routine of working a 9 to 5 job or trying to get
that promotion… the working life is meant to anesthetize you to
the real questions… the questions we are meant to ask…
what is the point of being human? what does the experience of being
human actually mean?
walk away from anything that doesn’t lead you to questioning…
question everything… and become aware…
aware of what… one might ask?
ask yourself? become aware of what?
Kropotkin