Art's art.

Because I’m laughing doesn’t mean I’m happy. When you say “something to smile about” you mean a deeper meaning, and a sort of feminine happiness, which I don’t have because the only emotions I feel on a daily basis are sadness and anger.

Good to be back, Arc my love.

My avatar is Trixie Bane about to fight someone in a Purple Hero Outfit (mare do well). The purple outfit is similar to trixie’s old outfit but it is not Trixie. This is a metaphor of my schizophrenia and multiple personalities and the fact that the thoughts in my head constantly antagonize and bully myself on a daily basis.

Ultimate Philosophy 1001

Of course it doesn’t. Some people may be happy and yet do not express that happiness through laughter. It can be a more quiet serene feeling.

But you are still laughing. That does take away some of the sting of the moment. It is still a catharsis.
Sometimes I think that happiness is a choice ~~ it is our choice to allow ourselves to feel more free, more stoic which can lead to some happiness ~~ or to be a woe-is-me.
When that butterfly lands on your shoulder, we have the choice to allow him to be there or to swat him away.

How deep a meaning does a smile have to come from?
I said a smile. I wasn’t thinking of either deeper or more shallow.
A flying moth can bring a smile without consideration.
Isn’t a smile just an automatic gesture on the part of the face? lol

Feminine happiness? Oh, so what are you saying here?
I don’t regard a smile to have a gender.

Well, perhaps I cannot know since I cannot live in your shoes. But you never experience any positive emotion at all?

What brought you back?

I know that it may seem incongruous to say it but I do wish you well always.

So what about the Art?

It’s not in my hands nor is it all my fault.
For example, I want to build a facility for ILP, but I know everyone is just going to dick around and try not to help me, and then it’s a repeat of Mother Hen. Being stoic gets you nowhere when the world is rigged against you and people don’t want to contribute anything. And there’s nothing to be happy about, people don’t want great things just want the world to decay into shitness.

Butterflies don’t land on my shoulder, I have to chase girls and deal with their bullshit.

Yeah it definitely does in the way you’re meaning.
Like, when I’m not feeling feminine, I dont feel the need to smile about stupid shit. Like a pretty building doesn’t make me happy, just makes me angry, because it’s stupid and my enemy. Nor does watching birds or nature make me want to smile.

Well, I was banned for 3 months because I said that carrots were not sentient and that lesbian sensuality was more popular than gay sensuality. Basically, simply stating obvious facts and truths may put you in danger of censorship.

A little bit smoother, yeah I need to post more.

Good to see you around Artimas. :smiley:

And good to be back here.

Why tell me why, do I even try
Lately I let loose and just cry
I wake up in the morning with a sigh
I wonder when my end will be nigh
Another day of Anxiety and depression
They form a trap, a crippling connection
Lately it creeps up when I am not suspectin
In the past, the last me let it out in agression
An acidic emotion which is anti-refreshin
I know others feel and do this too
But in my mind I am all alone, nothin new
I continue to sigh and cry then try again
To be happy, to not feel crappy, it’s not the end
It can’t be now no matter how much i feel
Outside is a smile, inside I scream and squeal
So loud and loud, but am drowned in the crowd
All I want is for someone to be so proud
A life of rejection, a lack of affection
Some people think it’s all for attention
As if I want to feel a huge wave of depression
I’m sorry I’ll go now, just thought I’d leave a message in this short session.

I’m addicted to the romance
And I ain’t talkin bout what’s in 'er pants
I’m talkin bout that calmness you get
When ya with your best girl just havin a cig
Just sittin outside or maybe in ya ride
Ain’t got no time for side hoes n drama shows
I’m talkin bout that real shit, that calm love ya get, maybe once maybe twice and if ya lucky maybe thrice, that’d be nice
Look into 'er eyes, know when ya got a real prize, ain’t ever 'gon wanna cut ties
It’s about that ride or die, that girl you call “mine”
The woman you can spend unlimited amounts of time with
Straight outta the sky, she’s God’s gift, she’ll give ya a lift, when ya down
Type of woman that rubs you down when you off work n lounging around
Call her Minerva, she a goddess
lookin so good in that laced up bodice

Perspective on paper,
I’ll be just another shaper,
Let these words paint an image,
life like a scrimmage.
here we go
Takin it slow, here’s what I gotta say
off of work, another long day,
hop the bus and I’m on my way,
Home, the place I wanna be
Bout ten more stops and I can rest these knees
Pull up to them tracks, in the middle of the rain,
thank god it ain’t a long train
Make a person wanna pull a glock to the brain.
One person here, three people there,
These stops be feelin like just another time snare,

Stole her heart like a burglar
I know I fucked up n hurt her
Now she left me here sitting alone
Don’t blame her, was a dysfunctional home
But I love her I love her, don’t want any other
I really never wanted her to feel any sufferin
Told her when she left we can start fresh again
Walk a new path, not where we already been
“No, i can’t right now love, I gotta grow, so
Don’t wait up for me, n I know you would, just don’t please, just leave for me, see you have done enough damage, yelling and treating me bad, it can’t be fixed with any type of bandage
you need to learn more, like how to manage
Your anger and anxiety, you seek attention
Through notoriety and negative adrenaline
I know you get it, why do I say it again n again”

Have you ever been so low?
Where if death beckoned you, you willingly go?
Like your last breath wouldn’t be too bad
What is worse than people making you feel mad?
When you’re the us and they’re the them
And it Brings you around the edge again
Maybe I really should dig a hole
Doesn’t everyone need some type of goal?
I try to stay positive but that’s just a game
Of cat and mouse and going insane

Let’s hear some more rap, man.

I was pretty blown away by what you wrote in my thread.

And to be real, war is an insane game, yet unavoidable, at certain point to lash out, before destroying your own, where the game becomes the goal to transpire, where hunters will become hunted .and may expire.

I have had more time to think, than I have had to do and that it seems is the underlying issue
So Does the spark in a man’s eye always die?
Even when you mark the truth and try not to lie?
Am I smart or wise? When I feel I have lost my personality and mind?
like the rainbow in me is only shading and not different colors anymore, am I still fine?
The trees are supposed to be green but they seem grey before their time
Did I peak at too much behind the door?
Did I chase too far in my desire for lore?
Does the spark stay dead forever more, or?

Hunted by the primordial chaotic infinite. On a loop of up and down and all around…

And becoming a ghost double haunting reality as if by fiat.
A required journey underworld, before permitted resurface.

Picking up the fragile pieces
that you left behind
Do tell, Don’t you see?
The Broken glass surrounding me
I think I am almost out of time,
While they dance in fire like it’s the prize
And They all still look just fine to me
They all look just fine
Lifted vision
as high as eyes can see
To lock thy gaze,
upon the ghoul
I have no answers for you here
Don’t you see,
I’m just a fool?

Another attempt
To tame the soul
Before I end up
A lifeless ghoul
Another attempt
To make it through
To the end,
I hope we do
It’s done me no favors
Again and again
I’m not sure hope
in the end,
Can bring me back
Around the bend
To find myself
Waiting there
Like a vampire sulking
in its lair
Eternal life is
eternal despair
For the pain is always
Waiting there

why do i feel like these should be lyrics in a linkin park song?

let me ask you something. do you wear a toboggan in the summer time?

this is a serious question. what i’m doing here is very scientific.

youtu.be/DGEX_7IqaC4