Two important new theoretical neuropsychology papers

I read papers like this all the time, no issue.

For those who “really” don’t have the time for such a complex thing:
In a nutshell:
My new theory explores the first principles of theoretical neuropsychology, thus figuring out the root cause of AD and other dementias. The theory is very simple. Psychological functions are carried out by neuro-circuital systems containing myriads of Dopaminergic and Norepic subsystems; due to greater burden upon the microtubules due to excessive electrical signalling in the type of brain which is dominated by Dopaminergic subsystems — greater thermal, mechanical, or chemical burden (exact type is not known… it is left to researchers to find out) — the microtubules break down*, causing Alzheimer’s disease and/or other problems like stroke and depression.

  • Matsuyama in the previous millennium had already theorized this (breakdown of microtubules) to be the causal agency behind AD (Matsuyama, S S et al., Hypothesis: microtubules, a key to Alzheimer disease, ‎1989).

Anyway, my thesis can be downloaded and read here: xinxii.com/en/brain-function … 63072.html (click on “excerpt”, which is the full book… we put saving humanity before profit :smiley:)

Wait, did you author the previous link you gave me too? I downloaded it, but haven’t gotten to it yet, I’m busy structuring Lorin Friesen’s system into a new mental mode map (did a bad job of it himself).

If you wrote it (the free paper already downloaded I’m asking about, not the pay for paper site) I can look it over sooner than later, just thought you were interested in the ideas. It was a 79 page essay “Brain Function and Dysfunction” by Anand Madhu.

Is that you? It wasn’t the two essays I expected.

Hey,
Anand Madhu, indeed that’s my name…

Within that 79 page essay, you can find the 2 papers*…

  • chapter 3 (Two Types of Signalling) and 8 (Linear and Nonlinear Thinking)

thing is, whereas the 2 papers have what might seem random assumptions – the 79 pg essay progresses step by step, substantiating each of them, so it makes for a logically more fulfilling reading.

Just finished your first chapter.

Your focus on norepinephrine… I don’t believe from direct observation of a man I’m taking care of (family friend, not as a professional care giver) who is in the beginning stages of dementia is correct. When I say beginning, I’m the only one picking up on it, despite his whole family being in medical fields.

I was working in the hospital at the time as a janitor, and both he and his wife was admitted on the basis of the flu, to the Heart Ward… was the most incompetent Ward in the hospital, the ICU attached was good, but the rest was incompetent chaos. I follow the basic philosophy of Doc Adams, a west Virginia physician, of encouraging joy in patients as a healing device. That floor of ducking savages could give a fuck about that… it isn’t warranted as part of their job, people are dying too much and there is too much overcrowding.

So when he was admitted, he went into a deep state of psychological shock and isolation, even to his wife which we got moved into the room with him. He always demanded the door be closed, curtains shut, no music, no tv, no talking, etc. He list all track of time, etc.

He was well know by some of the nurses and doctors, as he was their science teacher in high school. He us a WW2 vet, his entire unit wiped out in the air force save him and another… he wasn’t trained when they were… Was then trained for the B-29 to drop nuclear bombs, was set to drop one a week after, but Japan surrendered. I’ve looked over his information he claims to of been trained on, appears technically correct for how we operated back then… I lived on a Air force base as a child, know the basics of how rear bombing sights done on late cold war aircraft work (most people aren’t aware there is a rear underbelly cockpit).

I knew something was up, so I sat with him… just sitting with him for a few hours each day after work, just so he would have human contact… he lives a block from me, so knew me.

He couldn’t keep track of time, was always asking what day it was, cause the doctors earlier… hours earlier asked. I would say it 20-30 times, sometimes the false date, just to see how he reacted. I told him Reagan or Kennedy was president, or a failed Presidential candidate… no fucking clue I was playing a trick on him.

He would get angry militant when I turned on TV, refused the radio I brought (his wife used it with headphones, read the newspaper I brought him daily).

She recovered, he didn’t. He listens to me as he sees me as a authority figure, he always saw me as highly intelligent and I’m sure I invoke memories of the army. I realized I could exploit this, so quite unethically told him Doctor Smee (Me) said in order to get better, he had to listen to the TV one hour, or read out loud the news paper.

He would build in cognitive function, memory became more stable. He would give up, pass out.

I kept this going, playing old music off my tablet… was hooked up to wifi. He would listen, start moving his hands to it.

After a month, he was let out. In the end, he couldn’t fix a urinary tract issue, so was bound by internal catheter. He wouldn’t accept this, doctor wasn’t telling the truth, his highly educated family wasn’t… so I told him simply he would never till his last day be without his catheter, you exist less for yourself and more for others at thus point, just accept it.

He did, family was a bit upset I didn’t bullshit him, but he accepted it, was quickly discharged after he didn’t insist on getting his family to run more and more tests. I left the job shortly after being denied a promotion to working in the mechanical room by the union (hospital very much wanted to keep me) and was sitting around unemployed. Was contacted within three days by the family. They hired me to watch him a few nights a week, the wife, a retired nurse, couldn’t keep eyes on him 24 hours straight.

So a few nights a week, I or his daughters watch him nightly.

I’ve been observing onset aspects of Alheimerz like behavior, but it isn’t too obvious yet (I worked a short while as a nursing assistant in my teens in such a facility). He has dropped all former activities, except working in the yard in the hit Sumner sun (90 years old, hot and very humid here)… which pisses me off. He insists on doing it. He at his best asserts OCD traits, including in his dreams. I have those traits too, so is easy to recognize them for what they are. I’m told he always have had these traits, quick to anger.

But when he becomes fearful or despondent, he stupidfies. He has Musical Ear Syndrome now (as do I), running about trying to find where “that noise” is coming from. It is coming from lack of sensory information during the day. His wife gave up my therapy of making him play music, as he is used to dominating her, having a final say. I can’t play it while he sleeps.

I’m largely there because he fears dying in his sleep. I perform no useful function. I clear and water plants outside at dawn, not much else can be done.

He recently had a complete collapse into full blown child like thinking, like in the hospital. Object Recognition was gone, he didn’t comprehend at all what was going on. I was calked over, ran some questions to zero in on what he could get, and couldn’t.

Family noted he tried drinking detergent, then unscrewed the pepper, starting eating it. I saw nothing special about the last, but the family did… All through his life, he had low salt levels. Would unscrew the salt, eat a little in his palm when he felt it was low… thus is American Table salt, not Sea or Kosher Salt.

So… I discussed with the daughter my perplexity… his behavior went in cycles, he was just then exactly like in the hospital. I said it was almost like a blodclot, something restricting a feedback loop in the mind… but certainly wasn’t, cause I doubted very much he would still be around if he constantly had them. She said maybe a small stroke… but that doesn’t explain the recovery and my ability to aid him using simply techniques to increase his self awareness, ability to process information, etc.

She said her gut said it was Salt in balance, could cause a restriction in a blood pathway. I agreed it was a possibility, was a philosopher, not a doctor, but asked which salt would be in imbalance… neural activity need all four salts in balance, or I should say in balance, to process information diectionally… It is what allows the charge to carry in the fusrt place, and this in balance (like a battery) not only carries a charge, but acts like a referee flow Diode.

He was tested, salt was indeed low… was put on a high salt diet, one he immediately rejected once it took effect… he knows how to maintain his salt balance.

So… Things I’ve noted, that checks the presumptions in your first chapter. He sleeps much more when this occurs… I don’t think this in coincidental… the mind gets rid of neuronic impurities in the sleep cycle. This frequent napping in the elderly would act as a periodic buffer to your idea of neuronic over clocking in the NLMS system. The need to reassert new salts is often not noticed by professionals… as the body is getting rid of toxins, it needs to drain some of the salts and rebalance them in the REM cycle of sleep to aid in relearning.

I’m guessing this salt in balance, something we rarely test for unless you have heart issues… and even in his case when on such a chaotic Ward Rand by flying monkies, easily overlooked, can contribute overtime to the diminishing effects of balanced growth, that you noticed in n-trillinth or below availability.

Notice his OCD behaviors leads to marital Dominance… he is very judgmental, quick to angry, curt judgment.

We balance this against his dopamine fear response. This comes from his whole family, not just wife and children, but parents, being medical… except him so he couldn’t know what was going on, as well as exceptionally long lived… well over a hundred. He never was hospitalized since the 1960s, sees his inability to rid himself of the catheter as a personal failure… each damn visit he makes once a month to the uriologist.

Its obvious this related to a dopamine- norepinephrine imbalance, as a follower (aparantly the last… the only doctor, himself in his 90s who knew and followed him is himself in the 90s, had a stroke recently. Nobody takes that theory seriously anymore save me, a non-medical philosopher) of Doc Adams, I stroke systematically his Serotonin lows to highs. It follows the Lovheim Cube:

Thing is, I’m not certain which salts are off in relation to the related cytoarchitecture… the fear response batters his memory, sleeping recovers it a bit, but without the serotonin, he doesn’t cone out of it, and that setotonin impulse us always external (me, someone reassuring him). He oftentimes gets on the phone… or thinks he is on it, uses it like a walkie talkie screaming into it when it us off… Calling his son the pharmacist or daughter the nurse, saying not to abandon him, he needs them… ect. They don’t want to put him in the home yet. He doesn’t tolerate visitors, including me, during the day. He went nuts in the home they had him in for a short while after his hospitalization.

that box is a bit simplistic, based on old ideas, that bunch of misleading ideas about the 3 central neurotransmitters (e.g.: Dopamine (+Serotonin) = “enjoyment, Joy”, “reward system” etc.) See this link for a new, Norepi-centric view, for example:
csun.edu/~vcpsy00h/students/happy.htm

Explanation: Though Dopamine is behind a shallow type of pleasure, – Norepinephrine is behind what you can call true happiness, a different, uplifting joy or absence of depression (“elation” might be a close word describing it, and “self-actualization” etc.), a usual signal of the healthy brain. These 2 chemicals being so similar, their “pleasure”-type mental state alterations are also similar.
One can directly conclude that, according to the qualitative-quantitative law laid out in chapter 6 of my work – there’s a qualitative type of pleasure (the Norepi-based one) and a quantitative type (the Dopamine based one)…

[attachment7.rar|attachment](upload://lkjdBKebsij45bBYjdMG7dlNWau.rar) (71.5 KB)

I’m just starting chapter two.

That hypothesis isn’t that old, or the studies it is based on. It is from a older 20th century work based on a personality typology, but I’m used to working with a variety of works. You haven’t stated anything that convinces me your right…

Wait, come with me, I gotta shit.

Okay… that feels better.

So… Okayc where am I… Oh yeah, Serotonin is definitely a component of this, I believe neglect of diet, followed up by care giver neglect, exasperates this. I’m not unread or ignorant on the topic of hormones and neural transmitters, aware there are more than these three, they behave differently in a lobster than a monkeyc etc…

I do think there is a solid correlation we hit upon early in my state of west Virginia. You get high off noradrenaline, but it isn’t joy, or excitement. Your seeing tests not measuring serotonin present… Focusing on just N and D, not measuring S. It is easy to overlook, as it can vary person by person quantitatively the amount in the brain or gut. Especially in India, serotonin is largely produced in the gut, I eat high quantities of meat. Levels will undoubtedly differ from me to a farmer in the cow belt. I have a higher rate of self esteem, so it, S, is already high in me… if I’m just suffering from either a low D or N level, it will result in me being a happy or excited little fuck. Your test will only note increasing N or D, nothing of S. Excitement and Joy isn’t possible without it.

An analogy from India’s philosophy… Serotonin is often linked to pecking orders. It is often assumed by many that being super rich and powerful, like a king, makes you happy. At one point in our lives, everyone has thought this. The philosophers have often pointed out though the Grass isn’t Greener on the Other side, and kinds are often miserable and more depressed than most. They got the serotonin coming out their ass, everyone craves that respectability and high status, high self esteem… associate it with happiness, but that alone doesn’t result in it… if another aspect is missing.

However, behaving like a Nobel person… kingly and refined, generally is seen as a vital component to living a happy life. Few philosopher, save maybe Ramakrishnan, think acting like a lowly crack head makes one ultimately happy. One earns a heavenly existence by earning it, and that involves playing that part to a certain extent (or standing on your head for 40 years, I have no answer to that school of thought in regards to karmic theory of earning higher reincarnation, other than perplexity).

In the west, we developed similar theories of acting in a reserved manner in our household laws, how to keep your emotions balanced and leaning towards the pleasurable, good life… minus the reincarnation presumption… and nobody sat on their heads or stuck their arms out till they atrophied to do it. Never heard of a case at least… one guy jumped in a volcano… bit 99.9% of the advice was to mimick the behavior of the best examples… and in that era, it was the nobility… but we soon figured out they got their own issues too. Serotonin is s vital component, but not just it.

A drug might give you a temporary high, but it won’t last.

Just read that paper, it has older sourses than the Lovheim Cube uses generally. Secondly, they make the awkward, very painful effort of separating a emotive state from telelogy, only hinting personality may play a role. This is idiotic, personality is how we think and process, our consciousness vs our unconscious. Emotions underline all personality, and out ability to process and comprehend the origin and utility/purpose of emotion differs.

There is, for example, a song… I have no idea how popular, saw it on sake and downloaded it:

m.youtube.com/watch?v=tgIqecROs5M

We know this occurs more in the right brain than the left. I worked with a Montessori professor who specialized in special education, couldn’t get guys to sit the fuck down and shut up, and just fucking read. Those kind of guys…

She did tests, found they responded to 3D print, and excitement… she had to give them exciting stories like Aladdin to read. Just reading (left hemisphere, bored them.

A lot of our religious thinking, takes place in the right. I gave to Lorin Friesen, a expect on cognitive theology, the task of typing the philosopher Swedenborg… he and I both knew it had something to do with the right hemisphere, but Swedenborg focused heavily on the idea of “love” in every form possible to imagine. His concept of heaven was rigidly hierarchical both in rank and terrain… the Robin Williams movie “What Dreams May Come” is based on it, but there is a lot more to it.

His reply is a long ass essay here:

mentalsymmetry.com/swedenborg.php

The guy he is talking about in the beginning is me. He is a good cognitive theorist, not the best theologian, has some Mennonite bias, and feels a little too special about himself, fails to deal with contradiction and paradox, but approaches things from a engineering network perspective like you do in your work, just more advance.

He would be the first to note there isn’t one rewards and punishment center in the brain, but many, and that various personality types use them differently in a conscious manner.

This would explain the personality and teleological difficulties stumbled around blindly on in that link you gave me. He isn’t aware of the lovheim cube though, his theory doesn’t easily integrate into it. His brother’s does, but I don’t like his brother’s theory.

You will oftentimes see me lambast the Nietzscheans for asserting rank, pecking order, and Slave-Master gayness… It is not because I don’t think whipping someone gives a pleasurable high, but like you, they are simplifying the data too much. Serotonin alone doesn’t make one happy, the act of whipping doesn’t. It does if you have a dopamine increase coupled with serotonin… this is loving whipping. You care for the individual. Angry whipping, interchangeable… doesn’t lead to happiness but stress release. You combine the two, you get a wonderful psycho-bliss deserving of the nut house.

Only work though, if the whipper starts off with low serotonin, or is aroused incidently by a submissive begging to be whipped… a aroused sexual mate can cause many a odd fetish to be indulged in, but one, usually both, have very low serotonin levels. That is the basis of Sadism. Why they establish silly fucking pecking orders, want to be treated like medieval prisoners, then loved afterwards.

Swedenborg was aware of this, but stratified that sort of shit on the lowest of levels. Cause it, the stuff Sauwelios indulges in, is of the lowest and most pathetic kind.

foxnews.com/health/2016/08/0 … r-age.html

This news article largely refutes that link, shows it is teleological and self esteem based, relative to dependency and self image. They are seeking pleasure through this… many get it, many don’t. You gotta have at least two, serotonin the most important. Few combine all three, beyond a temporary orgasm.

Sorry these days i’m too busy making (or rather, getting made) a revolutionary website in between some difficult studies, and don’t have the kind of time that i used to have, and can’t revert as diligently as i should. Though, for one like me, it’s not so easy to sustain the process of interpretation, much of what you say makes sense to me. Anyway i think that, maybe due to lack of research, my views on human pleasure aren’t refined that well (but as far as i can see nobody’s are)… they are from an old draft stage document and as such i’ve left them out of my thesis – shouldn’t distract you from reading the full length of it, especially the part about linear and nonlinear thinking & alzheimer’s. You should try and understand deeply the roles of the molecular twins dopamine and norepi, and leave aside the molecularly vastly different serotonin for a while, for Serotonin is more physiological than psychological (when it comes to the issue of signal modulation, and not, for example, psychological pleasure, in which of course S has a tangible part)

I have a dopamine deficiency which is a pain [makes me nervous/depressed/rls], and doc gives me serotonin tablets for the depression doh! I think the agenda is that, rather than give people the cure, give them nice safe conservative drugs instead.

Can you describe the symptoms?
Who diagnosed you? I wonder could it be Norepinephrine deficiency instead of dopamine deficiency, as the former is more linked to anxiety and depression?
But Dopamine deficiency is also possible.
But how did this Dopamine deficiency come about?
Was it because of using (and then quitting) cigarettes or because of using cocaine/crack , as they stimulate the dopamine system which is left in the lurch by their removal (thus the withdrawal symptoms)?

Almost certainly serotonin is the right choice, would build your self esteem and make you less timid.

The Norepinephrine route would of turned you into Phred the Phuckhead (what is his new user name?)

Problem is, this in either of our suggestions (Mahdu’s or mine), it doesn’t actually treat your dopamine issues, just takes what little you have and shift it as far as it can into a new emotion.

What are the foods you most commonly eat? Are you in a physical relationship? Not a doctor, just a philosopher, so keep this in mind as you follow these questions and reply. The simplistic, lifestyle choices are often the wisest to look at first, when the physical body isn’t available for direct observation.

All three of us have high testosterone rates, you can tell from how we write.

If I had to pinpoint a position, based on your posts, for your personality, what drives your conflicts, I would point to the right dorsolateral frontal cortex. It us why in the time travel discussions, once you dismissed my refutation of times arrow because some physicist or philosopher said it would act that way… I didn’t bother following up to change your opinion… yes, your wrong, but the effort in trying to convince such a rejection in your mode of thought isn’t worth it, I’ve seen guys struggle for years on the small stuff because it reminds them of X.

Ironically, your half way to having a more balanced dopamine drive by this virtue, if everything is healthy otherwise. In MBTI, you show both Internal Perceiving and Sensory Judgmental traits.

This is what I select my categories from… it is how I can look at something and say “no” and yet modify it. It isn’t modified, remains a painful nuisance in my mind, until I can balance the intellectual questions, put down four rocks on the sides of the blueprint and work it out, looking for judgment but not having it.

That is a dopamine rush. Pure xSTP. Analysis. The capacity to arrive to process, observe, process, observe, looking at the multiplicities.

This isn’t external love. Very introspective.

My ISTP mode (INTJs switch between ENTJ and INTJ mostly through the day)… in a nutshell. Why security works, why the general’s position is designed for clever xNTJs, but starts off with bullshit guard duty as a ISTP… you can see that rationalization is old military texts like hagakure, that the roles of the shogun and the lowest soldier are the same, and both essentially do the others job, but the young pup has to go through the motions and accept the ISTP bullshit sentry roll forever if need be. You develop your E/INTJ traits as a response over time… if you ever do.

You wouldn’t be able to imagine your questions visually, or link up with my mode without testosterone… that doesn’t have to be high though… and no it doesn’t make you aggressive. Serotonin does. Imagine what happens in your classic fight or flight response… you fight and win… Serotonin goes up. You lose, early the fuck down… you get a depressed and timid person. Push them around long enough, they strike back, in anger… shoot you, fight you, etc. That’s Anger, hatred, rage… noradrenaline.

Taking that shit doesn’t increase your self image, it alienated you, make you listen to angry teenager music, wear dark clothing, say Lenin was great, and plot revolutions. It is a plot against serotonin.

Serotonin supplements is the wiser choice, but I don’t see how he decided low dopamine shouldn’t be treated by… dopamine (duh).

Your not dopamine depleted, cause if you were, you would lack the artistic flair to think visually and consider the possibilities and contradictions. That’s half of art, and art is driven in a great extent by dopamine (art of course is big, I should say exploring the methods towards beauty, what Satyr does is a obvious Inflationary/Deflationary game he passes off as intellectual mumbo-jumbo).

This article might help you see what I’m saying, you take facts from third parties better.

communityleadershipsummit.wikia. … rk_for_You

It is why knowing your foods and relationships matter. They both effect dopamine. I have no doubt your tests came back low, undoubtedly from age related issues, but I don’t see it inherent in your posts. You can still think imaginatively. Your using dopamine. If there, it is elsewhere.

Serotonin & Dopamine combined should result in more of that in humans. Decreasing it by enforcing a A Priori Priority system just on Dopamine at the expense of the other two , such as the immensely imperfect attempt at perfection, the Nordic Dysutopia… society stops adapting. It stops trying, it increasingly even stops fucking:

nbcnews.com/news/world/are-s … ow-n619746

You need a good mixture of three three. You try to exile one from society, society sickens and weakens. Noradrenaline is essential, but it certainly isn’t happiness inherently by itself, quite the opposite.

Anger may make a soldier fight better in combat, and good soldiers are an element of a just state, in securing a otherwise elusive peace, but if peace is good, and is essential for its leads to happiness, then anger is incompatible with happiness… but that happiness couldn’t exist rationally with said anger, if that is the case. Ethically, should shoulders be shunned from the rest of the happy society, in fear that they are incompatible, or should soldiers and that which motivates soldiers to be the best, be accepted into society, exlained as a supporting virtue that overall increases the happiness of all?

Utilitarianism says yes, yet the logic of utilitarianism wants to rebel against this, as it hates the pain associated with noradrenaline and dopamine fixed systems, avoiding serotonin. It is presumed you can arrive mathematically and mechanically at a clever equilibrium each time, like the bargain the administrator offers Neo in the Matrix.

This is wrong, off balanced. It is vital the brain uses all it’s aspects to achieve the maximum advantage. A cheap high doesn’t do it.

Not an area I am much versed in I am afraid. I get restless leg syndrome which people laugh at [the idea of], but its not funny when you can’t sleep. When I am unbalanced I get anxiety and it feels like my ‘centre’ is outside of my body if that makes any sense, the result is a feeling of entrapment. The doctor wouldn’t give me dopamine, even after I pointed out that in every article I read online people stated that dopamine had cured their problem. I’ve never taken crack, heroine or been a coke addict, but do smoke weed. I think that my deficiency [and hence anxiety] has increased over the course of my lifetime, but I also noticed the male line in my family is pretty much like that, although they as like me find coping strategies so they don’t come across like it publicly.

Not if you have a dopamine based brain; on horizon the other day, they were speaking of three main groups, and serotonin brains were more conservative and reserved [dopamine classed as ‘explorers’]. seratonin feels like its working against me, it does steady me off somewhat but doesn’t actually improve my condition.

My father has restless leg…were you adopted?

Oh now i get it… i can explain at least some of your issues (apart from restless leg and the feeling that your ‘centre’ is outside of your body).
It is that kind of dopamine deficiency you’re talking about which Aspergians** are prone to, especially if they smoke weed-- which basically makes you more aspergian*.

Well, this dopamine deficiency does occur with time, it’s something all weed smoking thinkers should know. But the same process also boosts up the Norepic aspects of your personality to superhuman levels, which ain’t that bad a deal, it is indeed overall even good, i feel, just does not seem so in “our” grossly imperfect world… and it even goes back to the idea that humanity* was born to toke, and became what it is (evolutionarily) because of that.

  • or let me state conservatively, not to tick off our friends like Turd, at least the nonlinear (if indeed not linear syllogical, which is more dopamine-linked) aspects of the human psyche, that essential aspect which the term “homo sapiens sapiens”, for instance, describes.

Even i have some of that kind of dopamine deficiency, which, historically, has been felt most sharply if i smoked weed everyday. You must be like me, highly theoretical but less “practical”-ly oriented. And your anxiety will not be a physiological anxiety that can’t be helped, but rather a worldview-derived one, something in the lines of “Ah, but what can i do in the pseudo-civilizational absurd”.

And thus you must be reformist?
It can be called the philosopher’s “handicap”, reduced performance in sublogical quantitative activity (but they make it up by logical thinking & activity which, alas, often happens to be blocked by the absurd)
It is actually the correct kind of mentality to have – do not put up with the absurd and its demands (rat race – which you can call a dopamine-heavy, quantitative mental lifestyle causing depression and ultimately leading to dementia)…

Rather, try to have a qualitative lifestyle even if it involves some fighting for your rights to have it. Low metabolic rate, live long, be elated much of the time, and have super-cool thoughts :smiley:

That’s what I thought was my condition, strangely the psychologists said that to have aspergers I would have language difficulties, yet I seem normal [what they said] #-o . …well they agreed until i pushed for benefits lol.

I agree weed is both bad and good, I gave it up for over 10 years. But now I can’t drink so its that or sit around feeling horribly normal [because normal is horrible in my experience of it].

Spot on. In another world where people could think properly i’d be fine. Have you ever noticed how badly people pronounce words, like they are defective in some way, and their thinking is equally unclear lol.

I am a reformist, mostly via challenging others notions. I agree about the rat race, when I was a young punk [an ideal subculture for me] I mostly escaped, but you can’t get away with it these days. I don’t think its just about earning money, as I could invent machines to replace almost everyone in e.g. factories at least, and I think there are already ways to do that. My feelings are that its an agenda – just to keep people busy.

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