Heart

Acceptance of reality. The shedding of your ideologies that force you to have a disconnected view of reality.

We’ve been conditioned in a way that warps our biology, i.e. the perspective of love. Biologically, love exists for a distinct purpose. Socially, we have perverted this purpose. Instead of accepting that love helps us procreate, we’ve been manipulated into seeing love as a path of happiness. This is so ingrained into our minds that we see it as vital to our ability to be happy/content/fulfilled… the irony is that happiness/contentment/fulfillment actually lies within us.

We use love as one way to validate our self-worth. When we’re rejected, it has the opposite affect, we feel less valuable as a being (like we’re lacking something). This is what you’re experiencing when you have your heart “broken”. If you accept yourself, as you currently exist, without thinking that you’re incomplete in some manner or lacking some core component… you would not be suffering these harmful emotions and/or doubts.

As for the regrets, it’s the same underlying issue, failure to accept reality as it is… rather than how you wish it to be. The time, the effort, the resources… all spent living life and experiencing it for what it is and what it isn’t. Your perspective is what makes these things a positive or negative experience.

Logic and aesthetics in combination does cure a broken heart.

Don’t ask me to go into detail, but if the two disciples mesh, the flaws will become seen as a deceptive and forlorn self punishment. It is that simple. However the appearent simplicity masks the years of not being able to reduce it as such.

Yes, if these things happened then all of these things are the best things that happened to you.

Only if you live a life in perfect denial and/or believe in a puppeteer God who you will love no matter what, without question.

There was a time when I felt that the concept of amor fati was a beautiful one…but perhaps I had not taken my thinking far enough…

I want to learn more and more to see as beautiful what is necessary in things; then I shall be one of those who makes things beautiful. Amor fati: let that be my love henceforth! I do not want to wage war against what is ugly. I do not want to accuse; I do not even want to accuse those who accuse. Looking away shall be my only negation. And all in all and on the whole: some day I wish to be only a Yes-sayer.

It is important to note that Nietzsche in this context refers to the “Yes-sayer”, not in a political or social sense, but as a person who is capable of uncompromising acceptance of reality per se.

My formula for greatness in a human being is amor fati: that one wants nothing to be different, not forward, not backward, not in all eternity. Not merely bear what is necessary, still less conceal it—all idealism is mendacity in the face of what is necessary—but love it.

At some point in our lives, there might come a time when we would have to come to accept the above list thing[s] which I mentioned in order to save our sanity and live again but that doesn’t mean that we would “see” these things as the BEST things which happened or come to love them…even if some good eventually occurred; for instance, having another child. That’s taking it to far…at least for me.

Your attitude for me appears to be more than a bit fatalistic but I may be wrong.

Is that some sort of obesity fetish?

:laughing:
Only if it’s taken too far. :evilfun:

They are the best things that happened to us because there is no other things that happened to us (accept it or die miserable).

Thinking your way IS a slow kind of dying miserably.

There is a reason that a horse wears blinders but even a horse doesn’t wear them all of the time.
If you take yours off, you will be able to see a much more panoramic landscape to your life, to life in general.
It’s there.
Contrary to what you believe, we need to see also the good and the beautiful in order to thrive and to want to live.

I do in fact take a panoramic view to life and encompass ALL things as the best things in life whereas your argument is that this is not the case.

If all things have the same status, none of them can be best. In order to have “best”, you must also have something that is not as good. A thing has to be better than another thing in order for it to be best.

All things don’t have the same status but all the things that have happened in our life are the best things that have happened in our life.

And they are also the worst things that have happened in our lives.

If you want them to be they can be, but life may get pretty damn miserable if you hold this view.

Yes, you’re right. Perhaps a way round that would be to call the things you like the most, the best things, and only call the things you don’t like, the worst things.

And that is why all the things that have happened in life are the best things that have happened in life.

I went through it once and dont plan to let it happen again.
Then I laugh out loud as I write that.

One Liner"

I believe that you are contradicting yourself here, One Liner.
First you seem to see differences and then you don’t.

Why would you see tragedy as a part of the “best things”? It may be one thing to be fatalistic and pessimistic but it’s another to view all of human reality and the human experience as being the same as you’re doing. You’re also taking the “individual” out of the equation. We become more like the Borg and less human in that way. But that’s just my thinking.

Your statement seems to me to be one of “living a lie”. We sometimes do this because we are afraid to face reality, afraid to see the tragic parts of our lives because of what it might do to us so we choose to live in our own little coccoons. The only thing is that we cannot begin to fly free like the butterfly does until we break free of the fear that binds us by looking at things rightly.

The only thing is that we’re unable to really experience the good and positive when we do this.
I think it’s just a coping mechanism. We all have them but some are better living tools than others.
If pain, loss, tragedy is the same to you as beauty, meaning, happiness, joy et cetera, you’ve missed the boat.

Arcturus, do you see yourself as a mother figure who knows what’s best for others and then lecturers them about what’s best?

Arc, at rare times, is rational.

This is one of those times.

If you emotionally relate to what she says then you will find rationality in what she says (I am ultra cool with that).