Rejection

Sounds crude but there were stories of artists who didn’t ‘lose fluids’ in the days preceding a performance because they believed it helped their passion for the music. I’ve heard many men joke that you should always masturbate before an important decision, because you’ll have a clearer mind.

As a teenager, I was struck by contrast between my thinking pre to post orgasm. Afterwards, I always had a sense that I was being manipulated. That I didn’t like this influence, but I had to address it in order to think clearly and be at peace. It’s straight forward reasoning to understand why it is as it is, but it never sits right by me.

I’m very sensitive to all the influences on my actions. I wonder if there’s a real ‘me’, that could be found if I stripped away all these influences. Often times, I find some part of me viscously rejecting values, people, or influences around me. It really throws me out of balance. Perhaps that’s why I think of suicide so much, because it’s a rejection of all these perceived manipulative influences. It’s like a safety mechanism.

When I was kid, I was abused by all sorts of people in sorts of different ways. Is the ‘real me’, simply the strongest influence that’s been directed at me? That of, they’re all monsters, and you need to be strong. You can’t be vulnerable any more.

Should I fight to reject, or rejection itself?

Life is most potent, when one is healthy. One can think most clearly, when one is closely attached to life. Thinking is a product of life. I think when I die, I’d like to be mentally ‘healthy/fit’, in order for me to be able to adequately guide myself down the road, without completely losing my shit.

Its why we don’t grocery shop hungry. Strong physical needs affect our thinking as well as strong emotions. Not sure that orgasms are not just a wee bit of legendary old wives tale. It has some little effect but, not enough to warrant major, unless you are addicted.
Trying to sate and calm all needs or emotions pre-action is damn near impossible. I think only Vulcans can do that and they are not real so there is that advantage.

The eastern religions advise withholding the orgasm. I am absolutely certain this is the gateway to two processes: thinking straight and the application of force to overcome by virtue of it’s diminished effects.

 The overcoming of this is seeing these two ways as essentially one, and here literally manipulation by the self, or figuratively manipulation by the other (or control) may subliminally divided, as to compress: the two into the one (ego). So it's a self defense. 

 I have been working against this force, and call it the gateway.  Not only is it art that  sustains it's force in this manner, but fear, also is tempered.

 Napoleon needed release in orgasm before battle in this way, because he had to divide the other as enemy. Then awareness of the opposing faction, the enemy became the object of projection, through this process.

 This truth was obvious to early moralists, but could not be explained to the young, so they chose to cloth it in the effects of the very fears they were trying to avoid.  However the authorities did not see this need to learn this intrinsically.

In finding the real ‘me’ it becomes a necessity to strip bare the soul from materialistic tendencies. I am not saying some degree of materialism is bad, but it is when you examine yourself as a person that one needs to be in-touch with the ‘child’ within their selves, the primogenitor alpha within you, the being you yourself would be if the world was devoid of evil and had you ascended to Valhalla. One has to question the validity of selfishness, self-centredness, and one’s own jealous tendencies. Consider this, if you could live indefinitely (up to any age you deem suitable given your reasoning – I hope you believe in an afterlife…) do these evil aspects bear any use? Why be envious of someone’s good fortune when surely, with patience, your time will come – furthermore him/her are not going you any harm, one should be happy for them!

I believe humanity was in general evolved with inherent traits of altruism and it is these materialistic tendencies we get influenced in our surroundings (call it the nature around) that pave forth notions in contrary to our inherent desire to feel joy for others and for ourselves. Once you are able to reach this enlightened state of perception it is then that you become aware of your inherent ‘me’ attribute. This stage is often known as reaching an ‘epiphany’, numerous individuals only reach this state in their senior years given accrued wisdom. You may have been abused by others when you were a kid and I would argue it is these facets that have obscured your ‘me’. The real ‘me’ is certainly not ‘the strongest influence’ that has been directed at you, instead it is a state of being in tune with your inherent instinct and soul; more often the urge to survive and foster good livelihoods on all those around you.

I would not incur that this whole ordeal is a fight to ‘reject’ (in this case surrounding evil influences), but it certainly seems it would seem like it. Once you discover your ‘me’, and see the world through new eyes, you learn that it is not about rejection; the matter is the rest is just clearly not part of you nor should it ever be (a rejection of sorts maybe). My advice would be to embrace every facet of life, no matter how insignificant (like a freshly baked buttered toast, going for a long errand to do a friend a favour – many interesting activities) for the magnificence it provides and then understand that those that sought to influence you are in fact influenced themselves by the non-living, not life itself. Remember, if wealth envy is your problem it should be kept in mind that even those that live in magnificent castles are in the end most likely depressed and all alone in so much space, whereas a nice small humble adobe is indeed a home that is comfortable – many other examples ought go here.

Exactly, physical needs affect our thinking and emotions. The needs most important to cherish for discovery of the ‘me’ eventuate from intangible assets – our perception over the tiniest things and our appreciation of small sensations. The minute you are open to the rejection of what is not you, and instead embrace the appreciative nature of the ‘me’, then is the moment you have hit jackpot.

I sensed this OP post was not exactly philosophical but more something suitable for a depression forum. Regardless, wise words of philosophy did eventuate.

The only release or nonrelease are hormonal. With orgasms male or female there is hormone surge in the body. One may have the preorgasmic hormone, causing need for orgasm. But thats it. Some may think clearer before, some after. Either way it is not strength or weak. Just a fulfillment of physical need, like not shopping hungry.

http://ilovephilosophy.com/viewtopic.php?f=2&t=185984&p=2489389#p2489389

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