Another one everyone would have likely heard before…
A theoretical physicist is in a bar drinking next to an empty stool, glancing at it every so often. The barman eventually asks him why and he says,
“According to quantum physics, a beautiful, blonde perfect woman could suddenly materialise out of all the many possibilities and form in her macroscopic self right here on this seat beside me and want to go out with me”
The barman says, “There are a few beautiful women in here; why don’t you ask one of them if they’d like to go out with you?”
The physicist replies, “Pfft, yea like that’ll ever happen!”
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Scholastics–God makes them do it.
Idealists–All the goodies are on the other side.
Existentialists–To come back and do it again forever.
Pragmatists–For some fowl reason.
Neitzscheans–It’s chicken, all too chicken.