Some people get this movie and some people don’t. Of course, there are lots of different ways to get it.
COOL HAND LUKE
Directed by Stuart Rosenberg
[b]Captain (turning to Luke): Lucas Jackson.
Luke: Here, Captain.
Captain: Maliciously destroyin’ municipal property while under the influence. What was that? Luke: Cuttin’ the heads off parkin’ meters, Captain.
Captain: Well, we ain’t never had one of them. Where’d you think that was gonna get you?
Luke: I guess you could say I wasn’t thinkin’, Captain.
Captain: Says here you done real good in the war: Silver Star, Bronze Star, couple Purple Hearts. Sergeant! Little time in stockades. Come out the same way you went in: Buck Private. Luke: That’s right, Captain. Just passin’ the time.
…
Carr: Them clothes got laundry numbers on them. You remember your number and always wear the ones that has your number. Any man forgets his number spends a night in the box. These here spoons you keep with you. Any man loses his spoon spends a night in the box. There’s no playing grab-ass or fighting in the building. You got a grudge against another man, you fight him Saturday afternoon. Any man playing grab-ass or fighting in the building spends a night in the box. First bell’s at five minutes of eight when you will get in your bunk. Last bell is at eight. Any man not in his bunk at eight spends the night in the box. There is no smoking in the prone position in bed. To smoke you must have both legs over the side of your bunk. Any man caught smoking in the prone position in bed… spends a night in the box. You get two sheets. Every Saturday, you put the clean sheet on the top… the top sheet on the bottom… and the bottom sheet you turn in to the laundry boy. Any man turns in the wrong sheet spends a night in the box. No one’ll sit in the bunks with dirty pants on. Any man with dirty pants on sitting on the bunks spends a night in the box. Any man don’t bring back his empty pop bottle spends a night in the box. Any man loud talking spends a night in the box. You got questions, you come to me. I’m Carr, the floor walker. I’m responsible for order in here. Any man don’t keep order spends a night in…
Luke: …the box.
Carr: I hope you ain’t going to be a hard case.
Luke: [Smiles, shakes head]
…
Arletta: You know sometimes I wish people was like dogs, Luke. Comes a time, a day when the bitch just don’t recognize the pups no more, so she don’t have no hopes, no love to give her pain. She just don’t give a damn.
…
Dragline: Stay down. You’re beat.
Luke [struggling back to his feet]: You’re gonna hafta kill me…
…
Dragline: Where’d the road go?
Luke: That’s it. That’s the end.
Koko: But there’s still daylight left.
Dragline: (checking the sun) ‘Bout two hours left.
Loudmouth Steve: What do we do now?
Luke: (smiling) Nothin’.
Dragline: Oh, Luke, you wild beautiful thing! You crazy handful of nuthin’!
…
Luke: Well that oughta be easy for a genuine son of a bitch.
…
Captain: What we’ve got here is… failure to communicate.
…
Captain: Some men you just can’t reach. So you get what we had here last week, which is the way he wants it… well, he gets it. I don’t like it any more than you men. It’s for your own good.
Luke: Wish you’d stop bein’ so good to me, cap’n.
…
Dragline: He ain’t in the box because of the joke played on him. He back-sassed a free man. They got their rules. We ain’t got nothin’ to do with that. Would probably have happened to him sooner or later anyway, a complainer like him. He gotta learn the rules the same as anybody else.
Luke: Yeah, them poor old bosses need all the help they can get.
…
Dragline: Knock it off, Luke. You can’t talk about Him that way.
Luke: Are you still believin’ in that big bearded Boss up there? You think he’s watchin’ us?
Dragline: Get in here. Ain’t ya scared? Ain’t ya scared of dyin’?
Luke: Dyin’? Boy, he can have this little life any time he wants to. Do ya hear that? Are ya hearin’ it? Come on. You’re welcome to it, ol’ timer. Let me know you’re up there. Come on. Love me, hate me, kill me, anything. Just let me know it. [He looks around] I’m just standin’ in the rain talkin’ to myself.
…
Boss: Sorry, Luke. I’m just doing my job. You gotta appreciate that.
Luke: Nah - calling it your job don’t make it right, Boss.
…
Luke: I can eat 50 eggs.
…
Dragline: Why’d ya got to go and say fifty eggs for? Why not thirty-five or thirty-nine?
Luke: It seemed like a nice round number.
Dragline: That’s money you’re talkin’ about. What’s the matter with you?
Luke: Yeah, well, it’ll be something to do.
…
Alibi: You’re peeling his eggs!
Dragline: That’s right, Mister Alibi.
Society: He peels the eggs himself. That’s understood.
Dragline: You jus’ may be great at hangin’ paper around the big cities, but us country boys is not entirely brainless. When it comes to the law, nothin’ is understood.
…
Dragline: Come on, boy, come on, darlin’. You kin do her. Just let that ol’ belly sag and enjoy itself. Stay loose, buddy. Eight more, between you and everlasting glory. Little ol’ eggs, pigeon eggs, that’s all, fish eggs practically.
Loudmouth Steve: Carr? Time?
Carr: Six minutes to go, Dragline.
Dragline: (into Luke’s ear) Just shakin’ it down, that’s all, settlin’ them eggs down
Society: Forty-four…
Carr: Two minutes to time…
Dragline: All right now: get mad at them eggs! Eat 'em! Bite 'em! Gnaw on 'em!
Society: Forty-five.
Carr: One minute, thirty seconds.
Dragline: …just stuff 'em in there any ole how!..That’s it, that’s how to do it, chew, chew, chew!!
…
Carl: Forty-eight boss. One in the box, one in the bush.
…
Boy [looking at Luke’s chain]: How you take your pants off?
…
Boss Paul: That ditch is Boss Kean’s ditch. And I told him that dirt in it’s your dirt. What’s your dirt doin’ in his ditch?
Luke: I don’t know, Boss.
Boss Paul: You better get in there and get it out, boy.
…
Luke: Picture’s a phoney. I had it made up for you guys…
Loudmouth Steve: We saw it all. You had it made.
Luke: Nothing. Made nothing, had nothing. Couple of towns, couple of bosses. I laughed out loud once, he turned me in
Koko [pointing to the picture in the magazine]: But I got it here!
Luke: Oh, come on! Stop beating it! Get out there yourself! Stop feeding off me!!
…
Luke: Where are you?..WHERE ARE YOU NOW?!
…
Dragline [mimicking Luke]: “Don’t hit me, boss…don’t hit me. I’ll do whatever you say.” You an original, that’s what you are. Them mullet-heads didn’t even know you was fooling.
Luke: Fooling them, huh? You can’t fool them about something like that. They broke me. But they didn’t get my mind right. Not with no sticks. No sir.
Dragline: All that time you were planning on running again.
Luke: I never planned anything in my life.
…
Dragline: He was smiling… That’s right. You know, that, that Luke smile of his. He had it on his face right to the very end. Hell, if they didn’t know it 'fore, they could tell right then that they weren’t a-gonna beat him. That old Luke smile. Oh, Luke. He was some boy. Cool Hand Luke. Hell, he’s a natural-born world-shaker.[/b]