We value based on emotion; that’s how humans work.
That’s basic neurology.
Pure rationality can only tell you what is better of some options in regards to a form of logic or another.
But it doesn’t place a value on anything.
With that in mind, I’ll try to explain as best as I can.
Short version: I had no emotional pull that there was a value with a return in greater volume than the investment one puts into the question of origin of all of existence ever.
Or to be more precise (as emotion doesn’t work that articulately to arrive at an actual argument like that): I never had an emotional push to move towards that direction.
It should be probably explained that from what I have gathered from others through life, I’m a bit odd in that regard.
Right now is easily contained for me.
For instance, the Zen practice of not thinking…that takes very little effort for me. I don’t think about a single thing quite often naturally.
Akin to this, when I was about 5 years old I was told to be home at 12.
I came home at 12:40 something and was in trouble.
I didn’t understand why fully until about two years later. To me, “12” meant anything prior to “1”.
It never occurred to me that 12 meant 12:00 and not 12:01-12:59.
You could say that was due to being a kid, but on the other hand; that kind of “missing the point” still exists with me today.
There is just something in the way in which I process on the acumen side that simply does not grasp the same things as other people appear to regularly.
So when I mean that it simply doesn’t strike me…it simply doesn’t.
Instead, I am more struck by what everyone else is doing in response to that question; always have been.
I liken it to being the guy standing at a football game.
There’s two teams worth of fans cheering and everyone is looking at the game between the two sides; barking for their favorite to win with grand emotion.
On the other hand, to me, the game going on never drew my eye. It was as if I had been looking at grass on the side of the road while riding in a car.
What stuck out as the spectacle to me has always been the fans cheering; watching how they move, act, react to and back to what takes place on that grass field.
So to me, I stand around just saying, to those that ask, that the real beauty and magic is being missed by most as they go into the big 'ol heat of everything.
The true beauty isn’t the game taking place, at least not to me, but the grand array that takes place in response to what is hoped for and believed to be the case.
The first thing I read that clicked in value wasn’t the Bible, or anything like it.
The first thing that clicked was a little fictional novel called Siddhartha.
Because in that book was a character that focused on now and drove himself endlessly to find the meaning of now.
That was the first time I had a light bulb click on and felt that I understood exactly what was meant by the ideas therein.
In the question of whether gods exist, my first answer is always, I don’t care; the more important question is what it does for you if they do or don’t.
That is what I see.
But when pushed, my answer is secondly, I don’t think it’s likely that gods do exist.
But I don’t mean that answer as anything that should affect anyone else’s belief that they do or don’t.
I would rather leave the world just as confused and torn about that question as it was before I showed up.
And I would because I like what it does and what it produces in humans with that question being something that they struggle with.
While I think there are far more readily tangible things to focus on, and encourage many to focus on the other aspects of life relating directly to their relationship from their self back to their self; I don’t mind for one moment that many are focused on gods.
I only wish that the many that focus on gods would allow for a bit more than just gods than they commonly do.
At some point, I believe people should be able to find rest in what their relationship is with the gods; either way; and move on to other relationships in life. Not stick on gods and stay there until they die.
So my interest in the matter of gods has always been an interest in the fans of gods.
Strangely…I relate to these words from a silly kids cartoon called Jungle Book: