why compatability is an illusion

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why compatability is an illusion

Postby Dan~ » Fri Oct 26, 2018 2:28 am

According to my religion : being compatable, or the same as, other people, is actually a bad idea.
The more diverse we are, the more specialization we can have.
2 people can be friends even if they share almost no mutual qualities.
Wanting to be friends as a principle of logic is superior.

It is logical that we have the most specialization,
via highest diversity.

Moderns seem to think the "we're all the same" shit is good.
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Re: why compatability is an illusion

Postby Dan~ » Sun Oct 28, 2018 2:54 am

Love for the pure sake of it.
Love for love.
Happiness for happiness.

These are pure.

Love for the sake of similarities,
Love as a reward for doing you favors,
Happiness because of food, drink, literature, etc.
Happiness because of an attachment,

These are impure.

This doesn't mean impure is bad, or pure is good.
This is a strait-forward truth.
One of the main reasons people who need friends most get the least friendships,
it's because they have to be appealing and the friends they get are crap/fake.
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Re: why compatability is an illusion

Postby Arcturus Descending » Fri Nov 02, 2018 2:30 pm

Compatibility does not mean being the same as ~ it means having things in common, enough in common so that people can work together or exist together peacefully.


2 people can be friends even if they share almost no mutual qualities.

What is that friendship based on then? For example?


Wanting to be friends as a principle of logic is superior.


I may be wrong here but it seems to me that there then has to be some shared value or interest ~~ like two colleagues working on the same scientific experiment but does that necessarily make them friends albeit there may be more meaning in their working together than is in some shallow friendships.
“How can a bird that is born for joy
Sit in a cage and sing?”
― William Blake


“Little Fly
Thy summers play,
My thoughtless hand
Has brush'd away.

Am not I
A fly like thee?
Or art not thou
A man like me?

For I dance
And drink & sing:
Till some blind hand
Shall brush my wing.

If thought is life
And strength & breath:
And the want
Of thought is death;

Then am I
A happy fly,
If I live,
Or if I die”
― William Blake, Songs of Innocence and of Experience


“No bird soars too high if he soars with his own wings.”
― William Blake
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Re: why compatability is an illusion

Postby Karpel Tunnel » Sat Nov 03, 2018 8:26 am

I guess I can't see compatilibility as an illusion. I get along with some people more than others. I am more effective with some people more than others. Some things in common, some things different seems to make for the best mix. If it is groups I probably not just tolerate but like diversity more than most people. It eliminates some of the pressures for norms and also makes thing more interesting. Still, some agreement about means, about the culture of the interaction - like do we get to mention our feelings, or is everything just cold and analytical - make a huge difference. And in some way similar goals are a must.

Then the more moral idea: that it is not really loving to just like people one is compatible with. Right off that seems to presupose compatibility. I don't see anything wrong in wanting to be around people who you have things in common with. If you have nothing in common, well, you can't be active with them. If they don't like to talk, and you do, well no conversation. I could likely be in a commune with people I had nearly nothing in common with, but if I had no values in common with them, then there is going to be conflict. And we do not share the same routes to conflict resolution...there's a serious problem.

Many people take compatibility way to far. It's more of a fashion thing. People have to have the right clothes or other things I consider inconsequential - of course, this relates to my values. They cluster in very monochromatic groups. I don't want to say they're wrong, but it does seem lke they are limiting themselves and others.
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