Communique's with Jesus the Christ

Jesus was walking the cow down the grim rocky path of the color of dust and honeybloodberryjuice and he said the the cow O Cow. Wherefore goest thou, where I goe?
And yet, the cow did not moo.

And Jesus walked its cow to another stretch of land, with the juiciest greenliest juicy grasslings green in the sparkly sun, for it has just rained.
And onceover, the J asks the mammal.

How, cow, art thou in my path, as my path, with my feet as if thine heart is mine? Speak!
And then the cow said:
Moo.

Hey, thought the Jesus.
That sounds sensible!

The rest…

[tab]is history.

[/tab]

jesus, what is the meaning of life?
You are the meaning.
I thought you was?
I am you.
Why is that?
meaning.
I dont get it
Then you are getting it.
How?
Slowly.

Pete walks off

Jesus sits for a while and finishes his burrito.

then Jesus walks off.

[tab]What is the meaning of this lesson?

let’s break it down folks.

line by line.

is this a philosophy site, or is it a porn site?
I thought so, it is good to know.[/tab]

Jesus, how should I get my food?

Get your food as you would like to live

and how is that?

Jesus looks Dan in the eye

Dan flinches

Just go to the supermarket and live your life, friend.

Dan is puzzled but walks off.
He spends the next 8 hours in a supermarket in front of the candy division, hesitant but neurotic.

that night, he throws up. It is green. He picks it up and eats it.

What did Jesus do wrong in this situation?

The King walks up to the chained Jesus and whips him with his rod. (his metal rod not his privates)
Jesus looks at him with burst eyeveins.
He shudders in his mouthcorner, some smile.
the king kneels
and put dowen his rod next to his leather boot
then a tapdancer arrives
she licks Jesus balls and thights
Jesus looks up
he muspers:
Father… what is become of me…
and he comes. On the face of the king.

All is arranged
there is no fate
only destiny

Yes indeed.

Praise him.

I did not expect this of you bbhorde!! :angelic-blueglow:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IHZbFimfS00[/youtube]

[-o< [-o<

Praise him!!

From my side I’m Southern Baptist. Can I ask your creed, not so barbarian horde?

BarbarianWhore is a Satanic Nietzschean currently residing in Montreal, Canada with his gay boyfriend from venezuela, he is originally a Jew from the Netherlands fleeing his own heritage and any sense of responsibility.

As a Southern Baptist, you too have remarkably a lot in common.

Who walks a cow?

I thought I come to a philosophy site… so many stalkers.
Barbarianhorde has made this thread about Jesus, and it is very good Im sorry for your mother.

No, this stopped being a philosophy site years ago, when all the philosophers were banned.

Well I’m here now! Let me teach you rule numero uno of philosophy. As long as you dont have anything nice to say, you keep your mouth shut.

I speak out of my ass.

I got to say something about Turdy, he is intelligent, and of good intentions, only lacking taste occasionally, which I am afraid is mostly in his mouth. But for that at least he is absolved.

And welcome True Philosopher, though gotta Dmit it I am fairly new here, as well.

tastes all we got
Turds is all turds got
im fine you?