You got a real toilet, or a squat toilet in a closet with clothes hanging above them?
There was a building on my base in Iraq next to the power plant (100 yards away)… by power plant I mean Iraq’s power plant, not just my base… and we officially labeled it “the crack house”… cause it was where Saddam’s guards lived… place regularly filled with smoke from the power plant.
I found the junction box to it, and it was sparkly, so didn’t want to touch it… I didn’t know about electricity back then, how to fix things yet. So I had a bright idea to get a bucket and throw water on it, and maybe that will fix it.
I really should of died, that was a very stupid idea… damn thing exploded in a giant arc of electricity… I was “smart” enough to stand at a angle to it, do it didn’t hit me.
Got one damn room in the place running 220 volts normally (still a tax bit sparkly) and I started collecting random furniture and found a giant white tiger throw rug… two beds, with mattresses, a stand alone air conditioner, etc… so started hanging out there, as a lot of guys refused to enter, despite it being on in our base thinking a ambush was in there… just me playing video games… but I made sure everything was blacked out in the windows, and hallway was creepy and collapsed as fuck, not warranting exploration without needing a tetanus shot… would undoubtedly came as a complete shock to anyone opening that door… a real WTF moment.
I always had to piss given how much water I was drinking, and didn’t want to go outside and be seen, even at night. So I found a closet with a hole in it, and was exploding, and pissed in it. I kept doing it, peeing in it. Had bats above it to hang clothes, so I held onto that while pissing and leaning.
When we got special forces stationed to our base, they took over my crack house (long since pilfered of it’s goods). Turns out that hole I was pissing into was a middle eastern toilet built into a closet!
I only saw a handful of them, internal plumbing isntbreal popular with the Iraqis. They carried water, pudding and shitting everywhere. I don’t want to squat and shit, but use a freedom toilet I can sit comfortably on, and wipe with bona ride, patriotic toilet paper… No water sodomizing my ass, no water butter and scrub brush I carry with me…
Just want a fucking, real toilet. I will piss in or on anything, but will not squat to poop. You gotta have like, ropes and stuff I can hold onto so I don’t fall. My knee sucks.