Comedy in all forms.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QReUbe4kp-o[/youtube]

The creepiest thing ever? :open_mouth:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HyNnrHWeL4g[/youtube]

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9UIJ7EtrNlE[/youtube]

Best parts:

No I didn’t call before, did you reconize the voice?

Yeah I can bet you don’t because you’d be itching your ass if you did, pal, that shit makes you itch.

I only work with safety equipment and a good firm. You don’t… fuckin’… give me the little shit breathers, I gotta have the good stuff.

What?

Rollen… I’ll ask for you and then you can put your fuckin’ boss on wit me, okay…

p.s. by ‘shit breather’ he means one of these cheap, disposable dust masks (for those who don’t know):

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eajkTddpeQQ[/youtube]

… but I’ll tell you what I gotta problem here.

Uht… my fuckin’ dog is inside the piano… he jumped… he musta jumped up there and got wedged down in the fuckin’ wires. And I need you to help me do someth… I don’t know shit about this tunin’, get him outta there!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rbs7q5E5mHE[/youtube]

This video should serve as a visual and auditory example in the definition of “degenerate”, it’s the frigging epitome of it.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hiCT73fhz7M[/youtube]

I sell em up in Middletown, upstate New York. I had a little problem over there though, that’s ah… something I don’t wanna talk about.

Yeah well you know… for some people maybe. Let’s talk about selling cars, Paul.

Whadaya… I could sell whatever you need sold I’ll sell. You got… bring in a tank I’ll sell the fuckin’ thing.

Ahh… you know it’s hard times. These fuckers they gotta buy… I need, you know I need dough like anyone. So what do you think, we got something going here or what?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zLI2GCG7pDw[/youtube]

Let me, let me tell you what I really do. I soak myself in lamp oil… and then I burn myself in front of the crowd.

… I jump around with dogs on the stage. Uh, I bring a little chipmunk in… and a little uh monkey and I beat him senseless in front of the crowd… they love that. Uh, I put a little ballerina skirt on the monkey and I beat him into oblivion. The crowd seems to love this.

Okay, where can we go with this? Show me. Talk to me you silly little freak!

One of my most favorite comedy scenes of all time.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D2ydY5sBnIg[/youtube]

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LUdHA5liNec[/youtube]

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D6Vptpml158[/youtube]

What the hell was that?

Cockatoos. One of a kind.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mALNyHFqw14[/youtube]

At 0:39:

I already had to clean up the floor. What else are you going to make me do?

Cockatoo: I’ll tell you what the fuck to do!

This Cockatoo has fucking had enough…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nsLmQF29OgU[/youtube]

Cyprus Hill jam. Watch the guy on the left say ‘WTF’?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SkPVAwuaoBM[/youtube]

That Cypress Hill parrot… priceless :laughing:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RB3g6mXLEKk[/youtube]

People who make videos like this should be given Nobel Peace Prizes.

Yeah but his buddy is just as funny. You can see it… you know he’s thinking ‘now this is why we can’t pick up any chicks because Daryl always acts like a fucktard at parties.’

youtube.com/watch?v=5UUjJysUMTw#t=84

This is Maxwell, a Cockatoo in a fatalistic, Kafkaesque soliloquy after being informed that he’s going to the vet. At 1:23 the existential angst becomes too much to bear and he breaks forth in passionate protest and defiance against the absurdity of existence.

youtube.com/watch?v=qdEKrzcUd9I

Rosa Lichtenstein highlights. On Rivers and Mystical Idiots (exclusive edition):

“In fact Heraclitus was both a mystic and an idiot. Who else would try to pass an opinion about change in the entire universe, and for all time, based on what he thought was true of his stepping into a river (the details of which he got wrong anyway)!?”

“Heraclitus was a confused mystic, who, among other things, thought that he could determine what was true of all moving bodies and/or processes in the entire universe, for all of time, based on a badly executed thought experiment about stepping into a river! [He screwed up because he confused count nouns with mass nouns.] Such a priori dogmatics has dominated much of ‘western’ thought ever since, including that which Hegel inflicted on humanity.”

“But, it is very easy to step into the same river. Or does BS think that if he steps into the Rappahannock it changes into the Potomac? On a side issue, it’s not a good idea to defend the useless ideas Hegel inflicted on humanity by quoting the even more confused ideas of that ancient mystic Heraclitus.”

“This mystical bumbler thought he could decide what was true for all of reality for all of time by observing what happens if you step into a river! And he got those details wrong too! It is surely possible to step into the same river (as I have shown above) and many times, too. What Heraclitus probably meant was that it is not possible to step into the same water twice. But even that is easy to do. Water is always H2O, and stays H2O no matter how many times you step into it. Maybe he meant “Step into the same body of water”, but that too is easy. If that body of water is Lake Superior, it does not change into Lake Ontario if you step into it. Perhaps he meant that the atoms concerned were different? But he knew nothing of atoms. Maybe then we can refer to different atoms? But every water atom is identical to every other water atom. So, it’s not possible to make sense of this obscure remark (just like it’s not possible to make sense of any metaphysical remark) that all too many comrades regard as gospel truth. Of course, if anyone thinks they can make sense of Heraclitus’s confused thought, they are welcome to try.”

“Heraclitus is hardly the most important philosopher ever – his work, or what little we have of it, is just a series of dogmatic assertions (many of which are false, too obscure to assess, or mystical rubbish). But even if he were, I am still happy to brand anyone a fool who thinks he/she can derive fundamental truths about reality from what might or might not be true about stepping into a river! And anyone who swallows this guff is in danger of being tarred with the same brush.”

“I am well aware that other ruling-class hacks, like Plato, thought highly of Heraclitus, but what has that got to do with whether or not Heraclitus was a fool to think that he could derive fundamental truths about all of reality for all of time from what was or was not true of stepping into a river (which conclusions we now know are false, anyway).”

“Heraclitus was talking out of his rear.”

" … this theory was then elaborated by the following mystics and ruling-class hacks: Plotinus, Proclus, Porphyry, Iamblichus, Cicero, Seneca, Marcus Aurelius, Epictetus, Pseudo-Dionysius, the shadowy figure Hermes Trismegistus, John Scotus Eriugena, Albertus Magnus (St Thomas Aquinas’s teacher), Meister Eckhart, Raymond Lull, Nicholas of Cusa, Giovanni Pico Della Mirandola, Marsilio Ficino, Henri Cornelius Agrippa of Nettesheim, Giordano Bruno, Robert Fludd, John Dee, Johannes Reuchlin, Paracelsus, Sebastian Franck, Valentin Weigel, Jacob Böhme, William Law, Emanuel Swedenborg, Louis-Claude de Saint-Martin, Friedrich Christoph Oetinger, Spinoza, Leibniz, Kant, Fichte, Hölderlin, Goethe, Schelling, Novalis and Hegel. Not one of these provided any evidence to support their universalist claims, since they were happy to derive their ideas from thought alone, as I alleged above."

“Modern day dialecticians make a weak gesture at attempting to substantiate their theory – by ‘cherry-picking’ which parts of nature they use, ignoring what does not fit – as do you. I have called this approach to knowledge ‘Mickey Mouse Science’.”

=D>

Orbie: James, I find meaning theory, to supplant indeterminancy inadequate, for the same reasons why hermenautics trump signs in representing meaning in terms of the will.

James: Did anyone have any idea what that meant? :-s
… anyone ?

A video I made a while back.

http://v8.tinypic.com/player.swf?file=op2p1u&s=8