26 and still single. Should I give up?

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26 and still single. Should I give up?

Postby Maia » Wed Jul 05, 2017 9:20 am

Why do I seem to repel all but the most unsuitable? Really, why? Should I just give up trying?
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Re: 26 and still single. Should I give up?

Postby Urwrongx1000 » Wed Jul 05, 2017 4:50 pm

Maybe you just have high standards? That can be a good thing. Never compromise your morals.
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Re: 26 and still single. Should I give up?

Postby Meno_ » Wed Jul 05, 2017 4:56 pm

No Maya, You should never give up, as long as You have marriage in Your heart's plan, even if, it goes against reason. The heart is unrelenting and defeats reason, speaking for myself.

If high standards present ablock, then, the question arises: which is more vital to You, and perhaps there may be room for some adjustments
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Re: 26 and still single. Should I give up?

Postby Arcturus Descending » Wed Jul 05, 2017 5:14 pm

Maia wrote:Why do I seem to repel all but the most unsuitable? Really, why? Should I just give up trying?



Perhaps like many women, you like and are attracted to the bad guy. Maybe you like the thrill which comes from that.

That is probably a question that you need to reflect on yourself though.

Then again, what do YOU mean by unsuitable?
SAPERE AUDE!


If I thought that everything I did was determined by my circumstancse and my psychological condition, I would feel trapped.


What we take ourselves to be doing when we think about what is the case or how we should act is something that cannot be reconciled with a reductive naturalism, for reasons distinct from those that entail the irreducibility of consciousness. It is not merely the subjectivity of thought but its capacity to transcend subjectivity and to discover what is objectively the case that presents a problem....Thought and reasoning are correct or incorrect in virtue of something independent of the thinker's beliefs, and even independent of the community of thinkers to which he belongs.

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Re: 26 and still single. Should I give up?

Postby Peter Kropotkin » Wed Jul 05, 2017 5:29 pm

as is known, I am hard of hearing... I didn't met my future wife until I was
32 and didn't get married until 36... today, July 5th... is our 21 year wedding anniversary...
so I wouldn't panic quite yet...perhaps in another 20 or 30 years you might want to
give up... however not yet....

Kropotkin
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wind up with neither."
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Re: 26 and still single. Should I give up?

Postby Otto_West » Wed Jul 05, 2017 5:53 pm

Lower your standards?
Your entire world of fantasy and make believe is doomed, have a nice day.
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Re: 26 and still single. Should I give up?

Postby Arcturus Descending » Wed Jul 05, 2017 6:03 pm

Peter Kropotkin wrote:as is known, I am hard of hearing... I didn't met my future wife until I was
32 and didn't get married until 36... today, July 5th... is our 21 year wedding anniversary...
so I wouldn't panic quite yet...perhaps in another 20 or 30 years you might want to
give up... however not yet....

Kropotkin


Ah, happy anniversary, Peter.

:occasion-balloons: :occasion-cake:
SAPERE AUDE!


If I thought that everything I did was determined by my circumstancse and my psychological condition, I would feel trapped.


What we take ourselves to be doing when we think about what is the case or how we should act is something that cannot be reconciled with a reductive naturalism, for reasons distinct from those that entail the irreducibility of consciousness. It is not merely the subjectivity of thought but its capacity to transcend subjectivity and to discover what is objectively the case that presents a problem....Thought and reasoning are correct or incorrect in virtue of something independent of the thinker's beliefs, and even independent of the community of thinkers to which he belongs.

Thomas Nagel


I learn as I write!
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Re: 26 and still single. Should I give up?

Postby Arcturus Descending » Wed Jul 05, 2017 6:06 pm

Otto_West wrote:Lower your standards?



That's not a good idea.

Remember ~~

When you reach for the stars you may not quite get one, but you won't come up with a handful of mud either. Leo Burnett
SAPERE AUDE!


If I thought that everything I did was determined by my circumstancse and my psychological condition, I would feel trapped.


What we take ourselves to be doing when we think about what is the case or how we should act is something that cannot be reconciled with a reductive naturalism, for reasons distinct from those that entail the irreducibility of consciousness. It is not merely the subjectivity of thought but its capacity to transcend subjectivity and to discover what is objectively the case that presents a problem....Thought and reasoning are correct or incorrect in virtue of something independent of the thinker's beliefs, and even independent of the community of thinkers to which he belongs.

Thomas Nagel


I learn as I write!
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Re: 26 and still single. Should I give up?

Postby Meno_ » Wed Jul 05, 2017 6:08 pm

Otto_West wrote:Lower your standards?




No,but values may perhaps be prioritized, and the ones not fitting, maybe changed. That is, if that seems credible.
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Re: 26 and still single. Should I give up?

Postby Maia » Wed Jul 05, 2017 6:52 pm

The only people who approach me are nutters and obsessives. Not sure how lowering my standards would help this.
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Re: 26 and still single. Should I give up?

Postby Urwrongx1000 » Wed Jul 05, 2017 7:55 pm

What type of guy are you looking for, exactly? And then, after you understand what you want, how would you plan to attract that type of man?

If you're purely passive then nothing will ever happen.
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Re: 26 and still single. Should I give up?

Postby Maia » Wed Jul 05, 2017 11:53 pm

Urwrongx1000 wrote:What type of guy are you looking for, exactly? And then, after you understand what you want, how would you plan to attract that type of man?

If you're purely passive then nothing will ever happen.


I don't know how to be non-passive.
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Re: 26 and still single. Should I give up?

Postby Magnus Anderson » Thu Jul 06, 2017 12:33 am

You need someone to help you.

Do you have parents?
Even if you do, I guess they won't be much of help.

Ultimately, you need a manager.
I got a philosophy degree, I'm not upset that I can't find work as a philosopher. It was my decision, and I knew that it wasn't a money making degree, so I get money elsewhere.
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Re: 26 and still single. Should I give up?

Postby surreptitious57 » Thu Jul 06, 2017 2:24 am

I can not give you any advice as I no longer do that but I really hope
that you find what you are looking for however long it may take you
A MIND IS LIKE A PARACHUTE : IT DOES NOT WORK UNLESS IT IS OPEN
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Re: 26 and still single. Should I give up?

Postby Maia » Thu Jul 06, 2017 8:00 am

Magnus Anderson wrote:You need someone to help you.

Do you have parents?
Even if you do, I guess they won't be much of help.

Ultimately, you need a manager.


Yes, I have parents and a brother.
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Re: 26 and still single. Should I give up?

Postby Peter Kropotkin » Thu Jul 06, 2017 8:13 am

Arcturus Descending wrote:
Peter Kropotkin wrote:as is known, I am hard of hearing... I didn't met my future wife until I was
32 and didn't get married until 36... today, July 5th... is our 21 year wedding anniversary...
so I wouldn't panic quite yet...perhaps in another 20 or 30 years you might want to
give up... however not yet....

Kropotkin


Ah, happy anniversary, Peter.

:occasion-balloons: :occasion-cake:


K: thanks, although this isn't really a Kropotkin thread....
Let us help our fellow ILPer and think of solutions....

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wind up with neither."
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Re: 26 and still single. Should I give up?

Postby Meno_ » Thu Jul 06, 2017 10:29 am

Maya, do You belong to Braille Inst., and do they have social services? If they do, so You partake of them? You may consider me short sighted forn such suggestion, but, I do not know Your situation, and do not know hardly anything at all. IT appears that it is difficult here to be honest, and as such the desire to be more confidential is to a certain extent difficult to none.

None of us want to be burt, and honesty and disclosure sometimes backfires

So please feel free to PM me anytime, and perhaps it would be possible to be more open there

Thank You,
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Re: 26 and still single. Should I give up?

Postby Meno_ » Thu Jul 06, 2017 10:30 am

Meno_ wrote:Maya, do You belong to Braille Inst., and do they have social services? If they do, so You partake of them? You may consider me short sighted forn such suggestion, but, I do not know Your situation, and do not know hardly anything at all. IT appears that it is difficult here to be honest, and as such the desire to be more confidential is to a certain extent difficult to none.

None of us want to be hurt, and honesty and disclosure sometimes backfires

So please feel free to PM me anytime, and perhaps it would be possible to be more open there

Thank You,
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Re: 26 and still single. Should I give up?

Postby Maia » Thu Jul 06, 2017 3:33 pm

Meno_ wrote:Maya, do You belong to Braille Inst., and do they have social services? If they do, so You partake of them? You may consider me short sighted forn such suggestion, but, I do not know Your situation, and do not know hardly anything at all. IT appears that it is difficult here to be honest, and as such the desire to be more confidential is to a certain extent difficult to none.

None of us want to be burt, and honesty and disclosure sometimes backfires

So please feel free to PM me anytime, and perhaps it would be possible to be more open there

Thank You,


Thanks. I'm not a member of the Braille Institute, but it's primarily American, isn't it?
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Re: 26 and still single. Should I give up?

Postby WendyDarling » Thu Jul 06, 2017 5:19 pm

Hi Maia,

If you are ready to get serious and start a family, join a dating service where they screen the men via your likes and dislikes. If the service is costly, ask your family if they'd help.

Or you could mingle more with males on some forums that draw on your interests. It seems that on philosophy forums, men circle females like sharks hunting their next kill. Of course most of the men are delusional in their beliefs that females are generally inferior to their superior maleness, but I have no doubt that you could set them straight on that account in the intellect department. :wink:

I met my male partner on the ILP website and we are getting ready to celebrate our one year anniversary of co-habitation.

Good luck Maia.
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Re: 26 and still single. Should I give up?

Postby Meno_ » Thu Jul 06, 2017 7:18 pm

Maia wrote:
Meno_ wrote:Maya, do You belong to Braille Inst., and do they have social services? If they do, so You partake of them? You may consider me short sighted forn such suggestion, but, I do not know Your situation, and do not know hardly
anything at all. IT appears that it is difficult here to be honest, and as such the desire to be more confidential is to a certain extent difficult to none.


None of us want to be burt, and honesty and disclosure sometimes backfires


So please feel free to PM me anytime, and perhaps it would be possible to be more open there


Thank You,



Thanks. I'm not a member of the Braille Institute, but it's primarily American, isn't it?


Yes it is, but are You aware of The Royal Institute of Blind People, or, Oxfordshire Assoc. for the Blind, Deafbkind UK, Dorset Blind Assoc., ?

If You do not have a seeing eye dog, Guide Dogs UK charity for the blind and Partially sighted may be of help.

Again, please do not take these suggestions as foreward in any way, if You are already familiar with their services.

Braille is very good here in all aspects of service to the visually handicapped, and there are a variety of people enrolled, of various social standing, ethnicity, religious and other preference.

I do not consider the search for companionship to be limited to those people , necessarily sharing the very same type of disabling condition as a given, however sometimes this preference may usually create a bond. Others may be attracted to the opposite, and relationships may be strengthened one partner possessing an ability to compensate for the disability of the other. It is so relative to the feelings, comprehension, and situation of those involved.

Take care.
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Re: 26 and still single. Should I give up?

Postby Maia » Thu Jul 06, 2017 7:23 pm

WendyDarling wrote:Hi Maia,

If you are ready to get serious and start a family, join a dating service where they screen the men via your likes and dislikes. If the service is costly, ask your family if they'd help.

Or you could mingle more with males on some forums that draw on your interests. It seems that on philosophy forums, men circle females like sharks hunting their next kill. Of course most of the men are delusional in their beliefs that females are generally inferior to their superior maleness, but I have no doubt that you could set them straight on that account in the intellect department. :wink:

I met my male partner on the ILP website and we are getting ready to celebrate our one year anniversary of co-habitation.

Good luck Maia.


Congratulations for meeting your partner here! I'm very glad you are happy.
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Re: 26 and still single. Should I give up?

Postby Maia » Thu Jul 06, 2017 7:30 pm

Meno_ wrote:
Maia wrote:
Meno_ wrote:Maya, do You belong to Braille Inst., and do they have social services? If they do, so You partake of them? You may consider me short sighted forn such suggestion, but, I do not know Your situation, and do not know hardly
anything at all. IT appears that it is difficult here to be honest, and as such the desire to be more confidential is to a certain extent difficult to none.


None of us want to be burt, and honesty and disclosure sometimes backfires


So please feel free to PM me anytime, and perhaps it would be possible to be more open there


Thank You,



Thanks. I'm not a member of the Braille Institute, but it's primarily American, isn't it?


Yes it is, but are You aware of The Royal Institute of Blind People, or, Oxfordshire Assoc. for the Blind, Deafbkind UK, Dorset Blind Assoc., ?

If You do not have a seeing eye dog, Guide Dogs UK charity for the blind and Partially sighted may be of help.

Again, please do not take these suggestions as foreward in any way, if You are already familiar with their services.

Braille is very good here in all aspects of service to the visually handicapped, and there are a variety of people enrolled, of various social standing, ethnicity, religious and other preference.

I do not consider the search for companionship to be limited to those people , necessarily sharing the very same type of disabling condition as a given, however sometimes this preference may usually create a bond. Others may be attracted to the opposite, and relationships may be strengthened one partner possessing an ability to compensate for the disability of the other. It is so relative to the feelings, comprehension, and situation of those involved.

Take care.


Yes, I'm very well aware of the RNIB and the various other groups here. Many of them are very good. I would rather date outside the disabled community, however, which probably sounds a bit hypocritical, but practical, nevertheless.
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Re: 26 and still single. Should I give up?

Postby iambiguous » Thu Jul 06, 2017 8:02 pm

Why don't you note all of the suitable qualities that you are looking for in a mate. Who knows, perhaps someone posting here might actually possess them.
He was like a man who wanted to change all; and could not; so burned with his impotence; and had only me, an infinitely small microcosm to convert or detest. John Fowles

Start here: viewtopic.php?f=1&t=176529
Then here: viewtopic.php?f=15&t=185296
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Re: 26 and still single. Should I give up?

Postby Destiny » Fri Jul 07, 2017 4:14 pm

If a man appreciates you and you see that man as a nutter what does that say about you, miss picky?
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