Kriswest wrote:RF , i greatly appreciate that but, I do not think you understand what Dyslexia is. Some have just writing issues , some just have oral issues, some like me have both. I was born in 63 back then I did not fit into mentally handicap or any other. I was an odd intelligent and stupid. I was just ignored by most except for a few true educators. RF, the reality of what I am does not bother me or make me feel inadequate. I am not complaining I am explaining. Those that love me and understand me are more than just a few. My bossesunderstand and love me. She has a form of Dyslexia as well. He does not but, he lives with his wife and since she does, he has learned to understand. I am not ashamed or embarrassed.i am realistic and am loved by special people. But I am not orally fit to lead. Dear gods you know what people are like. At most I could only lead by text.
I understand what dyslexia is. It's to some extent not being able to read or write very well because the letters some times appear backwards or upside down and some times words and in speaking, it becomes a bit of verbal diarrhea, stumbling over words, stuttering, etc. My step-dad was dyslexic, I've known others that have been illiterate to a large degree for whatever reason they've been that way and still see intelligence. The hard part is knowing, for sure, that it can be overcome, you just have to know how to fight it, where and when it breaks down and then reversing the flow of it. Like any disability , it's not something that can permanently be overcome, at least not immediately, and you might have to fight it your entire life through, but there is a point where it breaks down, where you break free from it; where it vanishes. I noticed that my sisters ex-fiance had a problem with stuttering, finding the words he wanted to say, being slow; he called it a retardism; but it vanished every time he got angry and moved into that place where he could say exactly what he wanted to, exactly what he meant to and there was none of his retardism and I pointed it out to him in the moment. I said, you gotta find a way to take that calm and the confidence and surety and learn to use that even when you're not angry. You're not so different from everyone else, Kris, that I can't find where you are, what you struggle with and tell you how to work toward fixing yourself and tell you the same thing you already know that it's an uphill battle the entire way through, but I can tell you that battle can be won, eventually you get to the top of the hill only to find out it's a mountain and you made it there blinded.
There are types of leadership beyond oral; there's the mind and the spirit and we all need to play to our strengths and know what leadership means for those strengths. You're not that great to even lead by text because that still taxes you and still makes you lose too much as you still fight to find the words you want. I've seen you stumbling here and there, not just in words, but in thoughts and that is not a sign of weakness to me, but something that happens to everybody equally no matter how good they get. When you stop working on fleshing out your weaknesses, when you're pressed by necessity to drop it all and be in the moment, that's when you find your strengths. It's funny how so many have an easier time of handling the major, epic, huge mountainous shit, but we stumble over the molehills, the petty, the drawn out. That's telling of the insanity of eternity and reality around us. I've found society's weakness and it isn't the petty, it's what it's good at it; it's not the molehills, it's the opposite for the group that it is for the individual.
So, what groups do you belong to? What groups have you become a part of to survive in this world, because everyone has wandered and been shunted and passed around until they found a group they could be comfortable with. Take a look at your surroundings.