Theater Of The Absurd

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Theater Of The Absurd

Postby Mictlantecuhtli » Mon Jan 25, 2016 6:49 pm

I am currently residing in the mountains of Wyoming in another cabin far removed from society and civilization. I've been living this sort of lifestyle almost two years now. It's peaceful really, nobody bothers me and every night I can hear my nature friends in the distance howling amongst each other.


Currently I am unemployed and I am living off of savings or borrowed time. I have maybe six months of savings to live off of. At the moment I am trying to misappropiate a bunch of free government money to pay for four years of medical school.

I would say that I have a fifty-fifty percent chance of pulling it off using the United States government social bureaucracy for my own benefit. This was always a sort of last option for me and it looks like my last card to play.

The goal is to attend medical school getting into a medical field. My main goal is to eventually become a funeral embalmer working with dead people. All jobs within the United States have been outsourced, downsized, or automated where I am trying to procure a career with the elderly, dying, and dead.


This is my last shot at trying to live a reformed life trying to more or less coexist with that so called thing that calls itself civil society. If none of this works I will be forced to undertake a more extreme and nasty form of survival that eventually will become unpleasant for many out there. *sighs*

I don't know if I am going to stay in Wyoming very long. If I fail to get on my feet again I am thinking about heading to Alaska, Montana, or Maine. More than likely Anchorage Alaska.

I have five months and then I'm off paper altogether. Unsupervised without being watched by the state.
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Re: Theater Of The Absurd

Postby Mictlantecuhtli » Mon Jan 25, 2016 7:08 pm

The last two years have been interesting concerning my own mental development. I find myself here amongst the barren frozen wilderness which is my refuge. Like a Buddhist monk or even a Zarathustra I have been looking deeply in myself along with the rest of the world around me in a sort of deep contemplative ongoing meditation.


I've took steps to try to reform myself and my beliefs trying to rid the monster within me but to no avail. I even tried rejecting my own notions of anarchism and nihilism but also to no avail.

What I've discovered is that I am what I am. I've come to embrace that psychosis monster within myself.

It's not pathological so much as it is biological. A tiger cannot help but being a predator and neither can it change its stripes. Likewise I cannot tame, curve, or domesticate the beast and demon within me.

I even tried revisiting religion again seeing if there was something I overlooked. Nothing, simply just nothing at all.

Whether God is real or not I hate the fucker and all the authority derived from it.
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Re: Theater Of The Absurd

Postby Mictlantecuhtli » Mon Jan 25, 2016 8:11 pm

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Re: Theater Of The Absurd

Postby The Golden Turd » Mon Jan 25, 2016 8:55 pm

More than likely Anchorage Alaska


I would recommend against that. The homeless only have a ten year life expectancy, and cops pick up any homeless found trying to leave anchorage and return them to the city.

You won't find a place under $900 a month. It has a very high population density, and food and processed fuel is imported. Plus the population is very, very pro militar, as most us descended from or married into it.

Likewise the native population collectively owns most land not controlled by the government. Short of marrying a Eskimo, your not staying, they will track you down.

I hear California smiles upon crime, especially in the more liberal areas, maybe you should try there.
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Re: Theater Of The Absurd

Postby The Golden Turd » Mon Jan 25, 2016 8:59 pm

Have you ever tried being homeless in a place not bitterly fucking cold?
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Re: Theater Of The Absurd

Postby Mictlantecuhtli » Mon Jan 25, 2016 9:26 pm

Turd Ferguson wrote:Have you ever tried being homeless in a place not bitterly fucking cold?


I am not technically homeless at the moment. I like remote areas and living on the edge. I like living dangerously.

You couldn't pay me enough to go to the west coast. I detest the people there. Thanks for the heads up on Alaska.
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Re: Theater Of The Absurd

Postby The Golden Turd » Mon Jan 25, 2016 9:38 pm

Try Baja Mexico then one winter. Apartments 100 to 200 a month, kayak for tuna.
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Re: Theater Of The Absurd

Postby Mr Reasonable » Tue Jan 26, 2016 12:18 am

All you have to do is fill out a fafsa. It's not that big of a deal. You'll probably be eligible for all kinds of loans and grants. That being said...medical school? You're going to have to get a bachelors first, then go to medical school, which would be maybe 9 years.
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Re: Theater Of The Absurd

Postby Harbal » Tue Jan 26, 2016 12:20 am

HaHaHa wrote: My main goal is to eventually become a funeral embalmer working with dead people.

What a relief, I shudder at the thought of you working with the living.
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Re: Theater Of The Absurd

Postby Ultimate Philosophy 1001 » Tue Jan 26, 2016 12:23 am

Or just go to Japan. I hear they like freaks, and besides, a Japanese highschooler has the same educational level as an eight year American college graduate. Sure, youll be laughed at by the other (non-adult) kids, but its the price you gotta pay if you wanna save lives.
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Re: Theater Of The Absurd

Postby Mr Reasonable » Tue Jan 26, 2016 12:25 am

I have a friend who embalms people for a living. She got a philosophy degree at a university, then when she graduated went to a community college and took a course on being a funeral person. She likes it, and the pay isn't completely horrible.
You see...a pimp's love is very different from that of a square.
Dating a stripper is like eating a noisy bag of chips in church. Everyone looks at you in disgust, but deep down they want some too.

What exactly is logic? -Magnus Anderson

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Re: Theater Of The Absurd

Postby Ultimate Philosophy 1001 » Tue Jan 26, 2016 12:27 am

Question in my mind, is why is a 9 year degree needed to embalm somebody, when the embalmment only lasts for 9 days.
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Re: Theater Of The Absurd

Postby Mr Reasonable » Tue Jan 26, 2016 1:09 am

It's not.
You see...a pimp's love is very different from that of a square.
Dating a stripper is like eating a noisy bag of chips in church. Everyone looks at you in disgust, but deep down they want some too.

What exactly is logic? -Magnus Anderson

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Re: Theater Of The Absurd

Postby Chakra Superstar » Tue Jan 26, 2016 1:30 am

HaHaHa wrote:My main goal is to eventually become a funeral embalmer working with dead people.

That'll make you super hot with the ladies. Personally, I wouldn't be caught dead with an embalmer but each to his own. :-"


(Good to hear you're doing OK, Joker. I love hearing stories about people living on the perimeter of the 'civilized' world.)
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Re: Theater Of The Absurd

Postby The Golden Turd » Tue Jan 26, 2016 1:47 am

They usually just do apprenticeships, I tried getting a job doing that in Hawaii, but never got a interview. 16.00 a hour starting off. You just dress them, drain them, sew their lips so their jaw doesn't drop during the wake, and dab makeup on.

I would be willing in your position to just take off and accept a training position anywhere in the country, preferably in a warm spot (hard to do funerals in permafrost land).

If you decide to go it alone, you'll need to buy a decent house, hire a grass service to chemically green everything and have a very nice plaster job done on the place, with a viewing room, and side room with cheeses in it do people can cry. You'll need a mortuary limo too, and bunches of little flags for each car.

Also, police will get to know you very well, you can't fuck the dead bodies cause sometimes a second autopsy will be ordered after you bury them, and you can't tell kids about nihilism if they ask if grandma is in heaven..... you gotta really feign respect for than and answer generically metaphysically, enough to dodge entrenchment in a belief they might oppose.

Oh.... and you gotta be able to roast them in a crematorium.... buying a oven. I hear it's really hard to turn the bones to ashes, gotta run them through a few times if they we're a milk drinker..... calcium, strong bones and all.

You'll do alot if transportation out of the loading dock of hospitals in the muddle of the night.... hospitals aren't big on heurses showing up during visiting hours out front.... so you will get calls to go three hundred miles out to pick up a stiff, wander about hospitals looking for security, told to go around back to the loading dicks by the trash compactors, put the stiff in, drive back after dawn, toss the body in a crematorium, and let them roast as you doze off..... every time you hear a car crash outside on the night of a big game, you'll get pissed cause you know you'll have all this work to do.

In very rural areas, your heurse doubles as a ambulance, you'll be required to taxi pregnant women to the hospital far away (with payment of course). They can ruin your apolstry.... it upsets the pall bearers to see blood stains underneath the casket area.

I'm serious.... no fucking the corpse, no matter how fresh and hot she looks. You can't just microwave them to make them feel warm either, or set them on a washer machine so it feels like they are moving, you get caught doing that once, your career is over.... it's hard to sell yourself professionally after that one.
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Re: Theater Of The Absurd

Postby Ultimate Philosophy 1001 » Tue Jan 26, 2016 1:54 am

If I die, you can fuck me (No not you Turd, the other fruit) but only if you agree to erect a monument in my name (stating I am the greatest philosopher who ever lived.)
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Re: Theater Of The Absurd

Postby Mr Reasonable » Tue Jan 26, 2016 2:39 am

Joker, I can probably get you a job down here just moving bodies to start. That friend of mine has a decent amount of pull and has tried to get me to do it repeatedly.
You see...a pimp's love is very different from that of a square.
Dating a stripper is like eating a noisy bag of chips in church. Everyone looks at you in disgust, but deep down they want some too.

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Re: Theater Of The Absurd

Postby The Golden Turd » Tue Jan 26, 2016 2:45 am

You have a friend with pull in the cadaver moving business?

He started low in the dead body hulking profession, and climbed his way up, knows some Mafia and big labor guys, can pull some strings kinda pull? Don't mess with this guy kinda pull?
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Re: Theater Of The Absurd

Postby Mr Reasonable » Tue Jan 26, 2016 2:52 am

She. She's been in the business since shortly after we got out of college, and has since worked her way up a bit with a company that has funeral homes all around the area.
You see...a pimp's love is very different from that of a square.
Dating a stripper is like eating a noisy bag of chips in church. Everyone looks at you in disgust, but deep down they want some too.

What exactly is logic? -Magnus Anderson

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Re: Theater Of The Absurd

Postby Zoot Allures » Tue Jan 26, 2016 3:02 am

There's a lot of dead ends in that profession, joker, and youre often expected to work long hours... so you know you'll be dead beat after work. Think it over first.
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Re: Theater Of The Absurd

Postby Mictlantecuhtli » Tue Jan 26, 2016 5:46 am

Chakra Superstar wrote:
HaHaHa wrote:My main goal is to eventually become a funeral embalmer working with dead people.

That'll make you super hot with the ladies. Personally, I wouldn't be caught dead with an embalmer but each to his own. :-"


(Good to hear you're doing OK, Joker. I love hearing stories about people living on the perimeter of the 'civilized' world.)


With which ones, the living or the dead ones?

Just kidding....Hello to you as well.
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Re: Theater Of The Absurd

Postby Mictlantecuhtli » Tue Jan 26, 2016 5:48 am

Harbal wrote:
HaHaHa wrote: My main goal is to eventually become a funeral embalmer working with dead people.

What a relief, I shudder at the thought of you working with the living.


I don't like much of the living either.
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Re: Theater Of The Absurd

Postby Mictlantecuhtli » Tue Jan 26, 2016 5:51 am

mr reasonable wrote:All you have to do is fill out a fafsa. It's not that big of a deal. You'll probably be eligible for all kinds of loans and grants. That being said...medical school? You're going to have to get a bachelors first, then go to medical school, which would be maybe 9 years.



That's my goal really, to misappropiate ten years of government public funds, grants, and loans for ten years without working all that much. The way I see it the United States isn't going to last another ten years socially or economically anyways where I am just going to have all the fun I can get over this abysmal cliff...
Last edited by Mictlantecuhtli on Tue Jan 26, 2016 5:54 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Theater Of The Absurd

Postby The Golden Turd » Tue Jan 26, 2016 5:53 am

Bernie Sanders will save us
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Re: Theater Of The Absurd

Postby Mictlantecuhtli » Tue Jan 26, 2016 6:00 am

Turd Ferguson wrote:Bernie Sanders will save us


The United States and the entire world is fucked. Everybody around the world knows this except for the majority of idiotic American sheople. It really doesn't matter who wins next election whether it be a Trump, Hitlery, or Sanders.

They're all going to fuck up the entire nation more so than it already is where I support them all only in that I would like nothing more than a collapsed American empire falling into chaos, anarchy, and civil war for my own personal ends.

My only problem is that I wish they would hurry up the entire shit storm of a nation in that I am not getting any younger over here.
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