i was gonna put this into the creative writing forum, but in fear of my obscene writing offending true writers (snicker ), i decided to post it here.
(my pen name)
Prologue 1 V 1.0
Somewhere in the boonies…
It was a misty morn while the sun crept the horizen…“no no no that sounds stupid.” crumple… swish… “nuthin but, WHAT?! ridiculous, i couldnt miss that!”
The sun crept the horizen, on the morn of Bobby insert generic lastname here’s 18th birthday. He rushed down the stairs for breakfast only to see his family waiting for him expectantely at the foot of the steps. "Bert I have a present for you, I know you have been waiting for this ever since you graduated from school. Mom, im bobby remember?! Oh whatever Billy, take your wretched present now before I change my mind. Bobby looked incredulously at the stick that his lil sis was anxiously shoving into his hands. “What is this?!! Did you make this out of the broom.” It was actually from the mop, and on the top was emblazened "Bert, with loving care from the insert generic lastname here family. "Well, what do you say to your mother son? Dad, what is this, it looks like a knapsack from out of the Huckleberry Finn stories!!! Dont be ridiculous bill, do you think that Huck would be prancin around with a fusia hankerchief tied to a broom stick? Bobbie’s family started to get a little fidgety and nudged him towards the door. “Well son it has been nice but your feet stink. Mom what does that have to do with anything? Benjamin Parker insert generic lastname here! I will not have you speak to your mother like this! You will go to your room at this moment!” As Bobby looked down in shame the family became visably impatient. “No thats not necessary Paul, it is his birthday. Sweetheart, my name is Perry remember. Whatever dear.” At that moment Bobbie’s mother looked up with a sad smile and said, "Well Bert we all must get going, so if you could just give us your copy of the house key and get going that would be great. BUT! By Bert, I hope you have a wonderful Birthday!
Mark was a brilliant fellow. He was always the first to raise his hand in class, and the whole school seemed to like him. He did have his faults however. It isnt easy being 31 in middle school, and his glutonous appetite for green crayons hasnt helped his complexion either. So with his bad complexion and superior heigth, he rode the short bus everyday. Today was no ordinary day for Mark, for today he was beginning the fourth grade!
"Hey Mark what did you bring for lunch today? Janice, I told you once that im not ever gonna trade Mommas legendary PBJ’s. Yeah right, just so happens that I have three weeks worth of crayons here. Mark eyed her flower pencil case with a emotionless gaze. “Done,” he promptly said. He tore into the case and then (overdramatic pause)“JANICE, how could you do this again! There isnt a single green crayon in here…” Janice winced as Mark began to sob uncontrolably. "But Mark, your teeth look so much better when you eat the stuff I give you! Look, there are only Yellow, White, and Pink in that box… Mark gave a disgruntled acnkowledgement and promptly shoved a pink glow in the dark crayon into his mouth.
The bus rolled up to Bellsouth Middle School and the brilliant minds of tommorow struggled to get of the bus. As they walked up the the steps and approached the threshold of their school, a strange looking elderly man wearing a fusia tie approached them. “Goog morning children, my name is Mr Bert err I mean Mr. Bobby insert generic lastname here. I will be your principle for the next year, and I am also the fourth grade English teacher.” Mark let out an audible groan. “Well sir, im glad that you came with your child, but you may go now.” Bobby stared back with a silly pink glow in the dark grin and said “No im your student, I just dont like English. Mr. insert generic lastname here Could I just have two pe classes?” Bobby stood in confusion for a moment and then continued from where he left off earlier. “Please walk to your home room in an orderly manner.” Bobby promptly turned away and receded to his emerald green principle’s office.
), i decided to post it here.