Frighter stated:
Personally I do not think ignorance is bliss, and it is only for this reason that I will spend time in explaining to you why I think masturbation is wrong. Otherwise, I wish thee long and splendorous experiences with yourself.
With a focus on the person versus the imagination I will attempt to illustrate that the more you masturbate, the more you are substituting the reality of another person there with you, with a compliant conception of a human being. Masturbation eleviates the need for interpersonal and romantic love. The more you do it, the less you value a real human being. The imagination makes the masturbator become use to a partner that does everything they want, when they want it, how they want it, for however long they want it, to the exact degree they want it. Since it is controlled by your imagination that you control at your every whim. What ends up happening is that you become less adaptable to new experiences with real people, you assume they will do what you want to do and invariably must get use to dissapointment. It will lead you to an unsatisfied sex life, in which you will be confused and most likely angry with your partner for not doing the things you like. Should they do what you like, it may come as a surprise to you when they are not satisfied with the sex life they have with you, since they will only be doing what you want, and your focus of pleasuring the other in the way they like to be pleasured will be diminished because of your habit of masturbation.
Futhermore, I daresay, you cannot help yourself when you are around an attractive female to associate your most recent imaginings to the real life person. As you can see, even before the act, you are suscepting the real person to your imagination and not to the actual person. Romance as an end in itself is lost, and the imaginings themselves become ends in themselves. It shouldn’t surprise most that after a few months of sex with the significant other, many find themselves bored, disinterested, and looking for the way out. Coincidentally, these people blame the others, and never themselves. So the end is destroyed, but so is the beginning. Since, those who have romance as their end, will want to get to know the person from the beginning, you will find everything about them fascinating. You will be interested in their mind. So when all sex positions will have been exhausted, and the Kama Sutra put back on the book shelf; sex and everything else with the person will remain of great pleasure and interest regardless of repetition, for the feeling of romance and love associated with talking to the person, being with the person, touching the person, looking at the person,etc. One or many of these experiences is associated with all situations with your significant other. These feelings never get old, as long as the romantic end is rationalized.
Don’t get me wrong, I too have masturbated, I don’t think I would have the nerve to speak of this topic if I hadn’t experienced it myself. But I have come to have a better understanding of it; and no longer do it for two basic reasons. (1) Because I don’t want to. And more importantly, (2) Cause I don’t NEED to. To many guys especially, use the reverse of the latter point against their girlfriends to get them to have sex, many woman may be familiar with the line “Come on, I need to, if I don’t I will have to do it myself”
Like you said, Frighter, it takes far to much control over one’s life.
Frighter, I have to apologize, cause I think the worst thing I can do is make you feel guilty while you do that, which can’t be healthy - I mean feeling guilty while masturbating. So either disregard my post, or I wish you luck on your quest of will power. But then again, it appears you already feel bad for it, since the first thing you said is that you find it annoying. I think sitting on the fence on this one is a bad idea, for your psyche I mean. I will borrow a phrase from Theodore Roosevelt.
“The best thing you can do is the right thing, the second best thing you can do is the wrong thing, but the worst thing you can do is nothing.”
What’s your take?
I don’t know, it’s probably totally the power of suggestion, but personally I think I feel more energetic and have better concentration whenever I abstane (spelling?) from all forms of sexual activity for an extended period of time. It’s probably just a myth though.