Story of my Life.

Elevate form over function to get at less easily articulable truths.

Story of my Life.

Postby GreatandWiseTrixie » Tue Jul 07, 2015 5:07 am

Story of my life can be described as a hyperbolic curve increasing exponentially on the y axis. The y axis represents the level of existential disgust.

As a child, it started out good. Moo. Moo.

I grew out of my wool.

Fell into the pool.

People tell me words.

I am fueled by Noumenon.

They tell me it will get better.

Their words, are hollow.

Noumenon, not connected to anything physical.

It never gets better, it only gets worse.

They try to heal me with noumenon, so that they they can escape responsibility.

They cannot heal.

I am the only true healer.

And they denied me my life. Denied me my ability to heal.

Their cities, their bulldozers, their modernity, strangling, suffocating me, to death, leaving me to die alone.

And they make parades, celebrating how holy they are, eating their mass genocides, laughing and talking amongst themselves.

I await anything, any kind of change, any kind of stimulation.

To escape from their flatness, their homogeniuty, their utterly, unbearable, apathetic homogeniety.

Time now flows backwards.

I know I cannot die, because my life is actually spawned from a point in the future.

Like a train, speeding and speeding up, seeing the same variations of scenery.

A pre-planned route. All, cliche.

It all goes by so fast.

The train never ends.
I am losing my mind to mandess.
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Re: Story of my Life.

Postby GreatandWiseTrixie » Tue Jul 07, 2015 5:13 am

I cannot escape my godhood.

Villians, only there to distract me.

Will the train ever derail?

Was derailment ever part of the plan?

I pray to a god I dont believe in.

I pray for change.

I am stranded, alone, suffocated in apathy.

Drowning in a pit, surrounded by genetic filth, faeces.

Like furious bubbles, they split apart, propogate, and manifest like crazy.

Bubbles, everywhere.

So easy to pop, but not so easy to enter.

Each day, grows longer.

Each breath, grows harder.

Each sunset, grows more lonely.

Each day, more hopeless.

Fueled by delusions, noumenon.

Each day, more powerless.
I am losing my mind to mandess.
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Re: Story of my Life.

Postby Orbie » Tue Jul 07, 2015 9:04 am

Pretty,
but sad,
pretty sad

pretty sad, said,
said pretty.

It is not that each of us, so
entangled,
but the depth of sensitivity,

must have been a beautiful baby.
still,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

for some memory casts a spell
memory chains the link
elludes the illusions
deludes the delusion,
or,
at least tries,
the bst way,
for me,
only the method
gives semblance of.
[size=50][/size]Allone's Obe issance



In answer to your prayer
sincere, the centre of
your circle here,
i stand ; and , without
taking thought,-
i know nothing. But i can

Full well your need-as
you be men
This: Re-Creation. With a
bow,
Then, your obedient

servant now.
One gift is all i find in me,
And that is faithful
memory
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Re: Story of my Life.

Postby Amorphos » Tue Jul 07, 2015 11:46 pm

trixie
Fueled by delusions, noumenon.


'The noumenon is a posited object or event that is known (if at all) without the use of the senses'.

Noumenon may only exist as informations derivative of "phenomenon", which refers to anything that appears to, or is an object of, the senses which always occurs after calibration, ergo is indirect information to the experienced and is in the class of secondary information. Both can only be ‘information’, and thus ‘noumenon’ may only refer to a different class of secondary information i.e. doesn't mean anything.
It’s relevance is whatever you wish it to be, and the same goes for the perceived more direct sensory info. Being nonchalant and apathetic is just an emotional state, you are making things seam meaningless when thats simply a matter concerning your emotion and not the thing itself.
The truth is naked,
Once it is written it is lost.
Genius is the result of the entire product of man.
The cosmic insignificance of humanity, shows the cosmic insignificance of a universe without humanity.
the fully painted picture, reveals an empty canvas
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Re: Story of my Life.

Postby GreatandWiseTrixie » Wed Jul 08, 2015 8:43 pm

Just an emotional state??

Emotions are everything, dude.

Matter, matters not.

A blob of physics can make you happy one minute, sad the next.

Feelings are the only thing that matter.
I am losing my mind to mandess.
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Re: Story of my Life.

Postby Zoot Allures » Thu Jul 09, 2015 2:15 pm

What is this word 'noumena' I keep seeing everywhere?
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Re: Story of my Life.

Postby phoneutria » Thu Jul 09, 2015 4:26 pm

Have you stood up?

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Re: Story of my Life.

Postby Amorphos » Thu Jul 09, 2015 6:50 pm

Trixie

A blob of physics can make you happy one minute, sad the next.


Exactly! One can artificially induce emotions.

If you know the feelings your having are false in some way [drugs etc], then you are to one side of them - so to say. This way we know that the will/consciousness can bypass the emotions, and hence they are made flaccid. All information is secondary to the primary consciousness, and emotions are information acting upon ones drives which would otherwise continue without them. Emotions are surely of the matter?

females eh! :-"
The truth is naked,
Once it is written it is lost.
Genius is the result of the entire product of man.
The cosmic insignificance of humanity, shows the cosmic insignificance of a universe without humanity.
the fully painted picture, reveals an empty canvas
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Re: Story of my Life.

Postby GreatandWiseTrixie » Fri Jul 10, 2015 1:12 am

Amorphos wrote:Trixie

A blob of physics can make you happy one minute, sad the next.


Exactly! One can artificially induce emotions.

If you know the feelings your having are false in some way [drugs etc], then you are to one side of them - so to say. This way we know that the will/consciousness can bypass the emotions, and hence they are made flaccid. All information is secondary to the primary consciousness, and emotions are information acting upon ones drives which would otherwise continue without them. Emotions are surely of the matter?

females eh! :-"


Drug induced emotions are not fake emotions they are real emotions.
I am losing my mind to mandess.
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Re: Story of my Life.

Postby Amorphos » Fri Jul 10, 2015 3:29 pm

No, you are real and that makes your experience of the false emotions real.
The truth is naked,
Once it is written it is lost.
Genius is the result of the entire product of man.
The cosmic insignificance of humanity, shows the cosmic insignificance of a universe without humanity.
the fully painted picture, reveals an empty canvas
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Re: Story of my Life.

Postby Arcturus Descending » Fri Jul 10, 2015 4:35 pm

Amorphos wrote:No, you are real and that makes your experience of the false emotions real.


What do you mean by "false" emotions, Amorphos?

For instance, when we feel emotional pain yet we laugh it off?
“How can a bird that is born for joy
Sit in a cage and sing?”
― William Blake


“Little Fly
Thy summers play,
My thoughtless hand
Has brush'd away.

Am not I
A fly like thee?
Or art not thou
A man like me?

For I dance
And drink & sing:
Till some blind hand
Shall brush my wing.

If thought is life
And strength & breath:
And the want
Of thought is death;

Then am I
A happy fly,
If I live,
Or if I die”
― William Blake, Songs of Innocence and of Experience


“No bird soars too high if he soars with his own wings.”
― William Blake
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Re: Story of my Life.

Postby Orbie » Fri Jul 10, 2015 5:36 pm

Amorphous has a point, it is knowing emotions from thoughts that make the difference.
[size=50][/size]Allone's Obe issance



In answer to your prayer
sincere, the centre of
your circle here,
i stand ; and , without
taking thought,-
i know nothing. But i can

Full well your need-as
you be men
This: Re-Creation. With a
bow,
Then, your obedient

servant now.
One gift is all i find in me,
And that is faithful
memory
Orbie
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Posts: 7596
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Location: Night of infinite faith

Re: Story of my Life.

Postby Arcturus Descending » Fri Jul 10, 2015 5:44 pm

Orbie wrote:Amorphous has a point, it is knowing emotions from thoughts that make the difference.


So when it comes to noumena, how does one separate emotions/feelings from thought? How does one know what is real or go about deciding what experience has value?
“How can a bird that is born for joy
Sit in a cage and sing?”
― William Blake


“Little Fly
Thy summers play,
My thoughtless hand
Has brush'd away.

Am not I
A fly like thee?
Or art not thou
A man like me?

For I dance
And drink & sing:
Till some blind hand
Shall brush my wing.

If thought is life
And strength & breath:
And the want
Of thought is death;

Then am I
A happy fly,
If I live,
Or if I die”
― William Blake, Songs of Innocence and of Experience


“No bird soars too high if he soars with his own wings.”
― William Blake
User avatar
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Re: Story of my Life.

Postby Arcturus Descending » Fri Jul 10, 2015 5:47 pm

'The noumenon is a posited object or event that is known (if at all) without the use of the senses'.


Wouldn't you say that something has to call it into being - how can that happen without the influence of the senses?
The human mind or psyche, along with how we are wired and the impressions/patterns made upon our minds early in life, have a lot to do with how we individually perceive things through our senses and how we experience things - not necessarily real as reality goes but nevertheless real to the individual. Noumena is created through the deepest core of our beings or perhaps it's the other way around.
Last edited by Arcturus Descending on Fri Jul 10, 2015 6:05 pm, edited 1 time in total.
“How can a bird that is born for joy
Sit in a cage and sing?”
― William Blake


“Little Fly
Thy summers play,
My thoughtless hand
Has brush'd away.

Am not I
A fly like thee?
Or art not thou
A man like me?

For I dance
And drink & sing:
Till some blind hand
Shall brush my wing.

If thought is life
And strength & breath:
And the want
Of thought is death;

Then am I
A happy fly,
If I live,
Or if I die”
― William Blake, Songs of Innocence and of Experience


“No bird soars too high if he soars with his own wings.”
― William Blake
User avatar
Arcturus Descending
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Re: Story of my Life.

Postby Arcturus Descending » Fri Jul 10, 2015 5:50 pm

Trixie,

How can someone go about healing you with noumena?
“How can a bird that is born for joy
Sit in a cage and sing?”
― William Blake


“Little Fly
Thy summers play,
My thoughtless hand
Has brush'd away.

Am not I
A fly like thee?
Or art not thou
A man like me?

For I dance
And drink & sing:
Till some blind hand
Shall brush my wing.

If thought is life
And strength & breath:
And the want
Of thought is death;

Then am I
A happy fly,
If I live,
Or if I die”
― William Blake, Songs of Innocence and of Experience


“No bird soars too high if he soars with his own wings.”
― William Blake
User avatar
Arcturus Descending
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Re: Story of my Life.

Postby GreatandWiseTrixie » Fri Jul 10, 2015 5:54 pm

Arcturus Descending wrote:Trixie,

How can someone go about healing you with noumena?


Counselors who say "it will be better"

And tell me "to look at the bright side"

When there is no hope, nor bright side.
I am losing my mind to mandess.
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Re: Story of my Life.

Postby Arcturus Descending » Fri Jul 10, 2015 6:10 pm

GreatandWiseTrixie wrote:
Arcturus Descending wrote:Trixie,

How can someone go about healing you with noumena?


Counselors who say "it will be better"

And tell me "to look at the bright side"

When there is no hope, nor bright side.


What does that have to do with noumena?

Any idiot can say those words to you. Platitudes. That's what someone says when they don't know what else to say.
You'd be better off just going outside and looking up at the stars. What you perceive you become and absorb.
Perhaps not much better than what they say to you but you might then be absorbing light, energy and beauty.

If you know what it is you really want to do what will make you happy, why obsess about it?
“How can a bird that is born for joy
Sit in a cage and sing?”
― William Blake


“Little Fly
Thy summers play,
My thoughtless hand
Has brush'd away.

Am not I
A fly like thee?
Or art not thou
A man like me?

For I dance
And drink & sing:
Till some blind hand
Shall brush my wing.

If thought is life
And strength & breath:
And the want
Of thought is death;

Then am I
A happy fly,
If I live,
Or if I die”
― William Blake, Songs of Innocence and of Experience


“No bird soars too high if he soars with his own wings.”
― William Blake
User avatar
Arcturus Descending
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Re: Story of my Life.

Postby GreatandWiseTrixie » Fri Jul 10, 2015 6:21 pm

Noumenon - (in Kantian philosophy) a thing as it is in itself, as distinct from a thing as it is knowable by the senses through phenomenal attributes.

Now what is a noumenon? A thing, that has no connection to phenomenon, or reality.

Such as hollow words, like "life is good". or "it will get better", and "stay positive"

When the mathematics shows, that my life is steady decline.
I am losing my mind to mandess.
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Re: Story of my Life.

Postby GreatandWiseTrixie » Fri Jul 10, 2015 6:23 pm

Arcturus Descending wrote:
GreatandWiseTrixie wrote:
Arcturus Descending wrote:Trixie,

How can someone go about healing you with noumena?


Counselors who say "it will be better"

And tell me "to look at the bright side"

When there is no hope, nor bright side.


What does that have to do with noumena?

Any idiot can say those words to you. Platitudes. That's what someone says when they don't know what else to say.
You'd be better off just going outside and looking up at the stars. What you perceive you become and absorb.
Perhaps not much better than what they say to you but you might then be absorbing light, energy and beauty.

If you know what it is you really want to do what will make you happy, why obsess about it?


I don't know what will make me happy. I just wanted to be loved. I now realize I was deluded. There is no love to be found in this world.
I am losing my mind to mandess.
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Re: Story of my Life.

Postby Arcturus Descending » Fri Jul 10, 2015 6:35 pm

GreatandWiseTrixie wrote:Noumenon - (in Kantian philosophy) a thing as it is in itself, as distinct from a thing as it is knowable by the senses through phenomenal attributes.

Now what is a noumenon? A thing, that has no connection to phenomenon, or reality.

Such as hollow words, like "life is good". or "it will get better", and "stay positive"

When the mathematics shows, that my life is steady decline.


I understood what a noumenon or noumena is. I see what you mean though.

But what do YOU need to do so that life CAN BE MADE BETTER - so that you can have a positive attitude - short of lying to yourself or denying your own reality?
“How can a bird that is born for joy
Sit in a cage and sing?”
― William Blake


“Little Fly
Thy summers play,
My thoughtless hand
Has brush'd away.

Am not I
A fly like thee?
Or art not thou
A man like me?

For I dance
And drink & sing:
Till some blind hand
Shall brush my wing.

If thought is life
And strength & breath:
And the want
Of thought is death;

Then am I
A happy fly,
If I live,
Or if I die”
― William Blake, Songs of Innocence and of Experience


“No bird soars too high if he soars with his own wings.”
― William Blake
User avatar
Arcturus Descending
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Re: Story of my Life.

Postby GreatandWiseTrixie » Fri Jul 10, 2015 6:42 pm

Arcturus Descending wrote:
GreatandWiseTrixie wrote:Noumenon - (in Kantian philosophy) a thing as it is in itself, as distinct from a thing as it is knowable by the senses through phenomenal attributes.

Now what is a noumenon? A thing, that has no connection to phenomenon, or reality.

Such as hollow words, like "life is good". or "it will get better", and "stay positive"

When the mathematics shows, that my life is steady decline.


I understood what a noumenon or noumena is. I see what you mean though.

But what do YOU need to do so that life CAN BE MADE BETTER - so that you can have a positive attitude - short of lying to yourself or denying your own reality?


I am immune to the effects of drugs. Only thing left I can do is change my DNA.
If I had more money I would live my life in one of those new age healing circles/massage parlors.
I am losing my mind to mandess.
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Re: Story of my Life.

Postby ended6 » Fri Jul 10, 2015 7:00 pm

I agree with trixie, I would also say there weren't any false emotions.

Drug induced emotion are real, in the sense that it is an existing emotion and it is being felt. Drugs increase the production of dopamine and endorphins which increases the sensitivity of emotions which is higher than the usual experience of the individual person.

People automatically think the default state is some how correct and perfect, or that you must just accept it. Which is ridiculous really given the fact that it is different for everybody, with that logic why bother with medicine at all, for anything.

Some people are just born into really unlucky emotional states that often increases the suffering and decay of the person.

Certain psychedelic drugs might create false perceptions, such as delusions but the emotions that come with it are real.

Personally, I would suggest psychoactive drugs, such as cannabis, where the thoughts and emotions are in tune.

With that said, no drug is perfect in the sense that it will make you feel how you want to feel. I think a lot of what we feel can be out of our hands, and you just have to ride it out.. this too shall pass etc..

Alternatively, use art or self acceptance of such an emotionally persisting state in relation to social expression.

I also would like to add, perhaps it will be unwelcomed, but I went to a doctor when I was a late teen, he said to me he has the remedy for everything, I said what is it..he said just stop giving a fuck!
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Re: Story of my Life.

Postby GreatandWiseTrixie » Fri Jul 10, 2015 7:12 pm

The "stop giving a fuck" remedy only works in short bursts.

Same with cannabis.

I have a remarkable ability to mimic mental states.

I only did a few times, and I gained it's essence.

I was able to mimic its mental state, in my mind.

I was "high all the time", as they say, without having to use the substance itself.

But when you are "high all the time"...how can you tell the difference between high or low? High becomes a low.

I crashed and burned.

The joker laughs from afar.
I am losing my mind to mandess.
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Re: Story of my Life.

Postby Zoot Allures » Fri Jul 10, 2015 7:14 pm

But that's all emotion is; the interaction of neurotransmitters, dendritic spikes and action potentials, and hormones. Fundamentally, an emotion is generated by ionized particles crossing a membrane. Saw a video of a doctor who had stimulated a specific region in the brain of a woman, causing her to laugh at the push of a button.
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Re: Story of my Life.

Postby ended6 » Fri Jul 10, 2015 7:17 pm

Crashing and burning has always come with the territory
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