Do you think people can change? Can we change completely, or maybe change some of the aspects in our character, or maybe we can’t change at all, and our genetics is all, or most that affects our behaviour?
yes of course people can change!
I know many people who changed, but the most changed from good into bad kinda.
And You also can see yourself changing, getting older etc.
I think life expiriences and society influences people and make them change. f.e. if you moved to a country with other habits you would have to change the way you are, so that you wouldn’t belong to the minority …
Like you said, life experiences and society infulences can change people.
But is it possible to change without moving to a different society. Can someone just go to work or to school one day, and be different then he has been before? And maybe most people just act like society expects them to.
I think that if a person wants to change, he has to start by something small, and gradually become a different person. This is at least from my own life experineces.
And another question: When people change from the outside, do they change from the inside to? Or is it possible to really change from inside. For example, lets say you haven’t seen a good friend for a few month, and then you meet with him. Is it possible that he will be completely differnt from how you knew him?
of course people can change without being influenced by external factors, but in my opinion it depends on your will. If you have a strong will you’re able to change yourself (inside and outside).
I know it from my own expirience, to be honest.
You can’t change yourself at once. It’s too radical. But if you start changing your habits and your ways of life it may help you to come out of the vicious circle.
And back to your question:
Of course it’s possible, and again it depends on what he has been going through during this time. It happens often that people/friends come and go and only few of them stay in your life and when you meet an old friend whom you haven’t seen for a long time, you realize that you both have chosen your own ways and that actually there is nothing combining you both. Then You start wondering why it has changed and if it’s your “fault” or his/her.
And about the society, most people behave the way the society expects them. Every person has many social roles, f.e. son, boyfriend, student, basketball player etc. And as soon as this person arrives school he changes his role into student, because the teachers (who have many roles themselves) expect him to learn and to required work. That’s about it.
I have changed much about myself over the course of my life, and am a much different person than I was in my youth, so I know real changes are indeed possible, but there are some limits on what direction and to what extent these changes can be made.
This is where genetics comes into play, acting as limiting or enhancing factors in determining what is possible. Then, the environment and my own internal drive take over and actually shape the changes, doing what is possible, with what nature has provided me in the form of my genetic structure.
I do believe that the hardest battles are those fought within yourself, and the least likely to be “won”. Changing who you appear to be is not that difficult, but changing who you really are is incredibly hard, but can sometimes be part of growing into full, adult maturity.
I believe one of the “secrets” of a truly “happy” life is to be (or become) someone who can be proud of who they are and how they live their life. What goes on before this happens is not nearly as important as how it ends up, and on occasion, is actually an integral part of the process. It’s very sad that quite a lot of people give up, when the road gets rocky and adversity hits, never seeming to realize that without some sadness, happiness isn’t possible either. When life knocks you down seven times, you just have to get up eight. (see a poem I wrote, titled No Regrets relating to this subject, in the Creative Writing forum)
Its plain common sense to me: Society doesn’t have time to mold each individual according to how each individual would feel best suited for life. Its up to the individual to become who they want to become. I dislike the word “change” for it’s obvious “cheapness”, I prefer the word “become”.
I’ve heard a saying once. I don’t remember the exact way of it, but it was like :“If you defeat the others, you may have physical power, but only if you can overcome yourself, you are STRONG.” (I only know it comes from a japanese karate sensei)… I’ve been thinking about it a couple of days, after the first time I had heard it and only then I started to realize what it actually means to fight against your mind and to change yourself!
Hello all,
I’ve been mulling over the nature of change since my brother became a father this past April. I’ve visited my new nephew on a monthly basis since his birth, and each time I’m struck by how fast he’s changing. Of course, you and I look pretty much the same from month to month, but our semi-constant exterior effectively veils the changes inside us, and it commonly deceives others into supposing that who we are is as constant as our physical self. Heraclitus spoke of not being able to step twice into the same river, yet we mistakenly assume that once we’ve taken the trouble to get to know a person - we know that person forever. Yet I suspect that if my face should change to match the changes in my person, my family and friends would routinely fail to recognize me altogether. A favorite quote comes from Søren Kierkegaard:
“The self is only that which I am in the process of becoming.”
When I hold my new nephew in my arms I can’t help but think that once my hands were as tiny as his. But to think that I was once an infant is to misapply the notion of who I actually am. “I” was never an infant, instead, an infant made the metamorphysis into a man, and that man evolved into the person that is now writing these words. The notion of “I” ought to be reserved for the self that exists on the fleeting balance between the person that I was, and the person that I am in the process of becoming.
Thought of in this way, it’s nearly impossible for us to know each other. To paraphrase Thomas Nagel, only I know what it’s like to be me, and even I have to be nimble in order to keep up with the “I” that I’m ever becoming. The surprise that others sometimes express once they notice a change in me is terribly frustrating - for the both of us. Once they decide for themselves what the snapshot of me “really” looks like, and what “sort” of person I am, they tend to hold onto that image with a death-grip. In fact, all that you can know about me is a fuzzy image of what I once was. People too often imagine they can know you by observing the wake that you’ve left behind; when the actual you is ahead, parting fresh seas.
Michael
I totally agree Polemarchus. And then once we have an idea of who we actually are, it is good to try and get to know another person really well as well.
I agree that people will change if their environment does, but might it be possible to predict how they change, from their genetics or psychological makeup? I have changed a lot (and I still am changing) over the last couple of years, but I still feel like the same person.
I think that you can predict how they will change, there is only some many choices a person has or things they can do.