One more question, my brother asked me:
“What did Jesus, who supposedly existed as god’s son, do after he supposedly rose from the dead…supposedly?” I thought it was funny and I forgot the answer…please enlighten us.
Well, umm, Youd probably do better to ask this of a christian.
According to the story, he climbed out of his tomb, rubbed his nail wounds, then hopped the next greyhound to heaven.
But that whole story is just a rehash of mithraism.
“Humanistic -hedonistic -Anti-theistic-individualism”
Actually, I would prefer that title. I think I’ll use it…if only I could remember it. After reading the majority of the Satanic bible, I find it extremely rational… but I think too many people warp said idea into their own twisted and foolish form, therefore satanists are looked down upon.
SATAN DOESN’T EXIST… unless you can prove god exists, neither does satan in my mind (haha, spell check wants me to capitalize satan as well as god, lol. As usual, I refuse.)!
I agree with the ideas, just not the way the ideas are portrayed. If one took out “Satan represents…†on every statement of the 9 satanic statements, I would agree.
“Since man is the only animal who can lie to himself and believe itâ€(I like that, sounds like one of my quotes…)
“How often we see little children who have been sent forth by these self-righteous Fagins to painlessly extract donations from the kindly. Who can resist the innocent charm of a child?†Hahaha, I hate children… and beggars. 
Yes, so I am very impressed. (And you don’t have to buy the book…http://www.geocities.com/church_of_5atan/satanicbible.html… I am assuming it is the same.)
Ahhh… thank you for that link… Now to make a point or two…
Because he allows ALL individuals to do whatever the hell they want!
It’s called free will…
Wow… I wonder what he is using to condemn “religionsists” ?? could it be a “rulebook”?? coughself-refuting bullshit cough!!!
Sure… why believe that the universe actually gives a shit about you? it’s been such a horrible bastard all these years… feeding you… giving you shelter… turning you into such a spoiled little brat!!
Hmm… I wonder who he’s refrencing by this? which actual religionist sits back in his chair and expects god to do everything for him?
I certainly havn’t met anyone…
Quicker? is he implying that praying actually get’s the job done? just too slowly for his tatse?
Or is praying a waste of time?.. Is meditation a waste of time? is reading the satanic bible a waste of time?
Who decides these things? if it’s the individual… then to hell with that shit… chritians are entitled to “waste” their time any way they see fit… and the satanist can bitch about it all he wants… and fool himself into believing he’s NOT wating his time bitching…
hmm… I think hope and prayers are for situations where your best judgment is that it’s none of your concern but still have an opinion about how the outcome of the situation should be…
Such as your best friend cheating on his wife… You might HOPE he’ll stop… but decide that it’s none of yur damn business…
It is extending your friend the RESPECT of allowing him to make hs own god damn choices without your arrogant ass whispering in his ear…
God helps those who help themselves, huh?
Sometime god kills those who are helping themselves across a street…
What the hell is a “wrong doing” anyway?
Ahhh… at last… a little truth… “degrading” is it? humiliating?
Don’t want to be humble… fine… make believe that you are almighty and that noone is your superior… I just hope someone takes the time to beat your ass to the ground… just to destroy that illusion…
Good advice for as all…
Hehe… true!
What do you care? confessing is among the “wrong” things they don’t consider “wrong” and will repeat over and over again…
There is no argument here!!! it is all self-refuting bullshit!!
Is this guy a mind-reader? How does he know how people envision god?
As opposed to calling them ALL delusional?
This guy is such an idiot… I can’t believe people actually give this “satanic” bible any credit…
And this guy is preaching his own views… so what’s the difference? is he saying we should manipulate people into believing what WE want them to instead of allowing them to think for themselves? so he is suggesting christians should stop praying and go out and forcefully convert people instead?
Fine…
be that as it may… it’s much more civilized then to kick the shit out of them!!
Freedome of speach and religion and all that jazz…
Make up your own damn mind…
How about an “anti-religios religion”?
You are free to be a satanist and hate theists… But then theists are also free to hate all satanists…
I will post some more quotes here later on… and ridicule satanism some more… For those that might be interrested… but not least. because I want to…
Well - you gotta give M.M. marks for quantity… 
Dr.S. reading Satanic Bible as we ‘speak’ give you my opinion later.
The fact that madman didn’t get it is reafirming 
I love this stuff!!
People who call themselves satanists are funny to me…
Like i pointed out before… real devils don’t ware horns…
People who put on horns are just confused…
satanism sounds very much like pantheism… with a reversed form of asceticism…
And the “hate” they display for religion is very much unfounded… which makes them irrational people…
Anyone who bothers to “hate” something is a fool in my mind… I don’t hate them… I pity them… and make fun of them until such a time that i become bored with it… and then i move on… I do the same to most theists…
And I laugh my ass off when they become upset…
I actually admire the way Dr.S tackled me… He’s proven himself, as far as I’m concerned… I don’t much care WHAT ism he proclaims membership of… they’re all the same anyway…
I disagree about the isms all being the same. Are you forgetting priapism? 
ROFLMGDAOBOTFSPJW!!! I stand corrected… and I’m MAN enough to admit it!
(P.S. ROFLMGDAOBOTFSPJW = Roling on the floor laughing my god damn ass off becouse of that funny shit Phaedrus just wrote!)
LOL that was hilarious 
(and I’m pathetic enough to admit that I had to go look that word up… and wished that I hadn’t). As for all religions being the same, that is just in your eyes: simply because you’re a god = universe kinda guy… that encompasses everything except atheism, but your nice little agnostic part covers that too.
I like the ideas of Satanism… but without all the meditation/curse crap (the only way to curse someone is to tell someone who believes/fears curses are true and yell: “Ha! I cursed you,†which isn’t really doing anything). So I guess I dislike all religions, as I think of Satanism as a theory, an idea vs. something one practices… but I don’t hate anyone. And looking back at prior posts, the only person you ever made fun of was yourself… I don’t insult other people, they insult themselves.
Sure… I agree… anyone who get’s insultet is being insultet by him/her-self… but that’s not the same as the only one you insult is yourself…
I can insult people without being insultet by them… or nessisarily be insulting myself in the process…
I can do whatever the hell i want… and even feel good about it despite what other people’s moral values/beliefs suggest…
I’m not bound by your beliefs… I am bound by my own…
If i truly believe what i preach… then no ammount of ridicule will insult me… or upset me…
If i it DOES upset me… then I don’t truly believe what I’m preaching…
But I’m not insulted… nor upset… I’m mearly making fun of satanists…
If they choose to get upset… well… then I’m not the one insulting them… right?
We find our true selves in the face of our enemy…
think about it…
Well - The Satanic Bible:
I read it. Now I’m reading another book about life in Turkey back in the days of upheaval just prior to the formation of the Republic. It’s very good, even though it’s fiction, quite a lot of the information is still relevant, especially to life in the Eastern regions, where everything is much as it was. With all the mysterious Tipex ™ marks glaring at you from the official Turkish history books it’s nice to fill in some of the missing details, even if the source is somewhat suspect.
Dear Doc.
http://www.ilovephilosophy.com/phpbb/viewtopic.php?p=1639949#1639949
I am an agnostic, who chooses the satanic philosophy, and I have only 2 objections to the religion
The greater magic rituals, which i dont have a probolem with since they could work through psychology, i just wish i wasnt called magic, since that would require faith in the unprovable which satanism is against at its core
The second objection i suppose doesnt matter much, but out of curiosity, why whould a satanist convert others to his religion? wouldent a world of people competing against you be harder to live in then a world where everyone but you is trying to help other people, including yourself?
1: Greater Magic requires no faith. It is about pragmatism…if something works, use it. If something does not work, discard it.
2: Satanists don’t proselitize. The vast majority of people are mediocre, and even of those that are not, few possess the nessessary dispositions that make one a Satanist.
Satanists are born, not made.
For the record, being a Satanist is not mutualy exclusive to being an atheist (as I am)
Satanism is about the here and now, and any speculation about afterlife is something different altogether.
Many Satanists are agnostic, some are even deists.
It is only when such speculation turns into what the good doktor described as ‘spiritual pipe dreams’ that interfere with or detriment life in the real world, does a problem arise.
OK, let me rephrase. The only person I can see who gains from selling satanic bibles is whoever has the rights to the cash. why would any satanist attract people to the movement, or bother correcting the popular veiw of satanism? wouldent that make more people into rivals for power?
I can only speak for myself in this instance. I enjoy the conversation that discussing my chosen philosophy brings. I enjoy teaching, just as I enjoy learning.
God isn’t real just as Santa Claus and Satan isn’t either.
Oh, Satan is real, just as anything that can be described by language is real. Perhaps not in the ‘dude with a pitchfork’ sense gliby put forward as a bogeyman by abrahamic traditions, but real just the same.
Unless you mean Satan is literally real, I don’t think Satan as a metaphor counts as a proper counter-point to Joker’s statement.
To all the Satanists out there, Satan is very real, but he is NOT your friend.
He does not want to liberate your mind, enlighten you, nor make you powerful.
He may offer you power, but as a means to an end: your utter destruction.
He is the spirit of evil. Evil is not your friend. Period.
God is your friend. He manifested himself in the person of Jesus.
Jesus is the benevolent spirit who will, truly, liberate you, give you peace, and make you powerful.
Use his name in times of distress. Call upon him to help you out in life. 