Basically i get the vibe that you think “people should be perfect”…
Ill leave it at that
if you’re going to make assumptions about me then it would be nice to have them backed up with some evidence.
anyway, this is not a forum for personal greivances, so i apologise if i have upset you, and maybe we can end it at that.
I don’t think we are up to my standards of intelligence. I think we could be smarter. I’m not excluding myself.
We should all be rocket scientists
The human race and computers. Are we stupid?
Computer Illiterate?
So you think you’re computer-illiterate? Check out the following excerpts from a Wall Street Journal article by Jim Carlton.
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Compaq is considering changing the command “Press Any Key” to “Press Return Key” because of the flood of calls asking where the “Any” key is.
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AST technical support had a caller complaining that her mouse was hard to control with the dust cover on. The cover turned out to be the plastic bag the mouse was packaged in.
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Another Compaq technician received a call from a man complaining that the system wouldn’t read word processing files from his old 5"1/4 diskettes. After trouble- shooting for magnets and heat failed to diagnose the problem, it was found that the customer labeled the diskettes then rolled them into the typewriter to type the labels.
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Another AST customer was asked to send a copy of her defective diskettes. A few days later a letter arrived from the customer along with Xeroxed copies of the floppies.
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A Dell technician advised his customer to put his troubled floppy back in the drive and close the door. The customer asked the tech to hold on, and was heard putting the phone down, getting up and crossing the room to close the door to his room.
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Another Dell customer called to say he couldn’t get his computer to fax anything. After 40 minutes of trouble-shooting, the technician discovered the man was trying to fax a piece of paper by holding it in front of the monitor screen and hitting the “send” key.
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Another Dell customer needed help setting up a new program, so a Dell tech suggested he go to the local Egghead. “Yeah, I got me a couple of friends,” the customer replied. When told Egghead was a software store, the man said, “Oh, I thought you meant for me to find a couple of geeks.”
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Yet another Dell customer called to complain that his keyboard no longer worked. He had cleaned it by filling up his tub with soap and water and soaking the keyboard for a day, then removing all the keys and washing them individually.
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A Dell technician received a call from a customer who was enraged because his computer had told him he was “bad and an invalid”. The tech explained that the computer’s “bad command” and “invalid” responses shouldn’t be taken personally.
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An exasperated caller to Dell Computer Tech Support couldn’t get her new Dell Computer to turn on. After ensuring the computer was plugged in, the technician asked her what happened when she pushed the power button. Her response, “I pushed and pushed on this foot pedal and nothing happens.” The “foot pedal” turned out to be the computer’s mouse.
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Another customer called Compaq tech support to say her brand-new computer wouldn’t work. She said she unpacked the unit, plugged it in, and sat there for 20 minutes waiting for something to happen. When asked what happened when she pressed the power switch, she asked “What power switch?”
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True story from a Novell NetWire SysOp:
Caller: “Hello, is this Tech Support?”
Tech Rep: “Yes, it is. How may I help you?”
Caller: “The cup holder on my PC is broken and I am within my warranty period. How do I go about getting that fixed?”
Tech Rep: “I’m sorry, but did you say a cup holder?”
Caller: “Yes, it’s attached to the front of my computer.”
Tech Rep: “Please excuse me if I seem a bit stumped, it’s because I am. Did you receive this aspart of a promotional, at a trade show? How did you get this cup holder? Does it have any trademark on it?”
Caller: “It came with my computer, I don’t know anything about a promotional. It just has ‘4X’ on it.”
At this point the Tech Rep had to mute the caller, because he couldn’t stand it. The caller had been using the load drawer of the CD-ROM drive as a cup holder, and snapped it off the drive!
What’s your take?
And according to my grandma computers are the devil. She also things I resemble hitler and that the devil has possesed me too but that’s besides the point. Another thing that she said that I find funny is this after I got my hair cut “You look like a movie star.” So according to her hitler should’ve been a movie star.
Different Ways To Say ‘‘You’re Stupid’’
· A few clowns short of a circus.
· A few fries short of a Happy Meal.
· An experiment in Artificial Stupidity.
· A few beers short of a six-pack.
· Dumber than a box of hair.
· A few peas short of a casserole.
· Doesn’t have all her cornflakes in one box.
· The wheel’s spinning, but the hamster’s dead.
· One Fruit Loop shy of a full bowl.
· One taco short of a combination plate.
· A few feathers short of a whole duck.
· All foam, no beer.
· The cheese slid off her cracker.
· Body by Fisher, brains by Mattel.
· Couldn’t pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel.
· He fell out of the stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down.
· An intellect rivaled only by garden tools.
· As smart as bait. · Chimney’s clogged.
· Doesn’t have all his dogs on one leash.
· Doesn’t know much but leads the league in nostril hair.
· Elevator doesn’t go all the way to the top floor.
· Forgot to pay her brain bill.
· Her sewing machine’s out of thread.
· His antenna doesn’t pick up all the channels.
· His belt doesn’t go through all the loops.
· If she had another brain, it would be lonely.
· Missing a few buttons on his remote control.
· No grain in the silo.
· Proof that evolution CAN go in reverse.
· Receiver is off the hook.
· Several nuts short of a full pouch.
· Skylight leaks a little.
· Slinky’s kinked.
· Surfing in Nebraska.
· Too much yardage between the goal posts.
· Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
· The lights are on, but nobody’s home.
· 24 cents short of a quarter.
What’s your take?